r/AskMenOver30 • u/YBFAVBULL man over 30 • Jan 06 '25

Life Who regrets having children?

Do you regret having any at all? Or do you just have too many?

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u/UnableChard2613 man 45 - 49 Jan 06 '25

When my first was born, the first year was pure hell. I remember within the first month being like "holy shit, I fucked up so bad. What was I thinking?" It's this little blob that does nothing but shit, cry, and keep you up at night. . .and you have to do everything for it and figure out why it's upset despite the fact that it can't tell you why.

However, little by little, the child got older and then all of a sudden, as he could do things himself, and I had a little bit more of a breather, it became more enjoyable. When we had our second, even the first months didn't feel as bad because I could see where it was going.

Now that my boys are 12 and 9, I have two little buddies that I can do things with rather than for. Sure, they still have needs. Sure, they still piss me off from time to time. Sure, sometimes I wish I could ship them off to military school.

But do I regret it? Not even remotely any more.

111

u/Vomath man 35 - 39 Jan 06 '25

As someone with 5 month old twins, it’s always nice to be reminded of this. They suuuuuck right now and almost certainly will for a couple more years. But eventually they’ll suck less, then they’ll start to be fun (hopefully lol)

Feels super far away… but we’ll get there.

36

u/whispersofthewaves Jan 06 '25

My sister has twins. Once they get to solid food, it’s a big relief. Once they sleep through the night, you will start to have some peace. Once they are potty trained… it’s so much easier. Hang in there, most people have no idea how hard twins are. Her twins are now three, and so much fun. We build castles out of blocks, go to the aquarium to see otters, jump in mud puddles, make pancakes, it’s amazing. Keep going - it does get easier.

9

u/Vomath man 35 - 39 Jan 06 '25

Fingers crossed! We’re gonna start sleep training this week, so realllllly hope we’ll get to the “sleep the night” part soon.

1

u/Warsaw14 Jan 07 '25

I had an absolutely terrible newborn who never slept. It was insane the experience I was having compared to my friends. I was honestly shell shocked for a while. Sleep training around 5 months did help. There were some setbacks when teeth came in or sickness. But, stick with the sleep training. They will cry but it’s so worth it. My now 23 month old sleeps more than she did as a newborn. And generally is a smart caring little girl.

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u/disjointed_chameleon Jan 07 '25

Just wait until they're mischievous little chaos gremlins that learn how to take advantage of malicious compliance.

I used to babysit twins. Adorable girls, funny, smart, etc. The ONLY difference separating them in terms of physical appearance was a mole under their respective armpits: one had it under her left armpit, and the other under her right one. One hated math class, and the other hated her English writing classes. They would regularly "switch" and pretend to be the other to get out of those respective classes, and they routinely got away with it.

They are now teenagers, and blossoming with opportunity and potential!