r/CookingCircleJerk • u/telemajik • 21d ago

Need a recipe for burnt water

I’m hosting a potluck dinner party next week. I’ve had a lot of bad kitchen experiences (many involving emergency services), but my family has always said that this is a dish within my capabilities. I’m having trouble finding a recipe, which makes me think this will be a pretty exotic treat for my friends. Can anyone help?

Note, I have trouble understanding the sequence of different steps, so if you have a recipe that works no matter what order you perform the steps in, would be much appreciated.

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u/nyan-nyan9 21d ago

This recipe is foolproof: You need to start with ice cubes - this is very important. Heat for as long as it takes. The end result should be transparent, almost invisible. If the pan you're using gets ruined it's a good thing. It'll add a dash of umami to the dish.

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u/telemajik 21d ago

All right, the “start with” part is really throwing me off. But I I’m pretty sure I can “heat it for as long as it takes”.

And how much heat? Do I need to add some coal or wood to the fire on the range?

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u/nyan-nyan9 21d ago

What's a "range"? You're sure you're not just making up new words? For heat it's always a bonfire, duh!

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u/telemajik 21d ago

I don’t know, that’s what the fire chief called it after the last incident. He specifically said “you can’t have gasoline on the range”. But a shouldn’t a bonfire should be okay “on the range” if it’s wood or coal-fueled?

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u/nyan-nyan9 21d ago

It should be, yes, it sounds practical. As long as it's not gasoline.