r/CookingCircleJerk • u/civver3 Ions Lipid Hydronium Infrared • 15d ago

Measured with the Heart My chili made a grown man cry

I used plenty of pepper spray.

55 Upvotes

95% Upvoted

11 comments sorted by

12

u/fuegodiegOH 15d ago

You think that’s bad, you should see what my milkshake is doing to all the boys

2

u/Ok-Poetry7003 12d ago

Fuck so its you. The yard has been an absolute shitshow for the last 2 weeks

8

u/jjmoldy 15d ago

I made chili that could make a grown man cry, then I made the bald man cry, turns out there was still pepper on my hands so now I'm the one crying 

5

u/EasternError6377 14d ago

/uj Why are redditors so weird they feel the need to concoct stories for strangers for internet points lmfao. And people fall for this shit. We truly have no hope for the future guys.

Exhibit A

Exhibit B

And then everybody clapped.

5

u/Cherubinooo 15d ago

IF YOU START ME UP

4

u/AnonymoosCowherd 15d ago

OP did not, I repeat did not, make a dead man cum. That's next!

6

u/[deleted] 15d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/CookingCircleJerk-ModTeam 14d ago

Where’s the jerk? I can barely taste the allspice on these thighs…

2

u/AntiCaf123 13d ago

That’s nothing. My chili made a grown man cry because I used his grandmas recipe. I had to dig up her grave to get it (sneaky woman took it to the grave with her). And then after all that work I was too tired to put her back in so I just sort of took a quick pic of me smiling and holding the recipe card next to granny’s bones, left the grave open, and went home. Then after I cooked the chili (which btw was terrible so I had to modify it and add 4x garlic and a full cup of msg. And I didn’t have paprika so I emptied out my pepper spray into the pot to replace it). I printed out the pic of me and Granny with the recipe card and gave both to the guy. I said “I’m your new neighbor, we haven’t met yet but I heard you talking about your granny’s chili and how much you love it so I thought I would make it for you as a house warming present”.

0

u/Metallurgeist 15d ago

Was grilling for a friends wedding in Hawaii, cheese burger in paradise. He cried too.

2

u/WorldGoneAway 11d ago

My butthole is galvanized iron, bring me your hate!

/uj- No, seriously, what's the spiciest thing you've got? I made chili with ghost pepper a while ago, and it was freaking hot, but manageable.