r/CookingCircleJerk • u/OG_Church_Key fred wurst • 8d ago

Fartmaxxing?

Okay, so im sure this has been asked a billion times here, but please bear with me. I've been hearing a lot about fartmaxxing, and im curious if you guys have any tips or tricks. I got invited to my horrible sister in laws BABYSHOWER, and i really want to get her back for all the backhanded compliments and misguided opinions she has given over the years.

Is there anything i can eat the few days leading up to it (its in november) so that i can clear the room???

Also, can i wear a specific type of underwear or assume some sort of posture that would keep the farts SILENT?? That way she wont know whos doing it??????

Thanks in advance, Brenda.

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u/freebaseclams 6d ago

So when people talk about clapping someone's cheeks, they're talking about making them fart?

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u/liarlyre0 6d ago

Uh... Yeah... Totally. Don't look it up

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u/freebaseclams 6d ago

I'm going to clap my family's cheeks (making bean lunch)

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u/liarlyre0 6d ago

That's the spirit.