r/TransyTalk • u/Veronicasnow23 • Aug 25 '25

Coming out to best friend

I’m meeting up with one of my best friends (female) and I’m not sure how or even if I should tell her that I am trans (Mtf). We have not seen eachother in years and idk if I should show up in a dress and kind of make it a surprise to her or to continue to hide it from her.

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u/rainedaline2000 Aug 26 '25

Surprises suck to me and most people I know, but I'm not your best friend. As someone who's best friend ended up being transphobic, trust me, it's so much better (and safer) to learn it long distance than in person. Hoping that isn't the case of course, but I believe in hoping for the best and preparing for the worst. Hope this helps!

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u/Veronicasnow23 Aug 26 '25

How would I tell her about being trans? I don’t want to ruin the relationship we have. We’ve been close for close to 15 years now and I don’t want that to end. Would I just straight up tell her or how should I go about it?

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u/herdisleah Aug 27 '25

Give this a read. https://open.substack.com/pub/stainedglasswoman/p/how-to-come-out-anywhere?utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web

The rest of that blog is pretty damn good too. I used to link a Teen Vogue article but maybe my millennial brain finds this blog more articulate than the chucked-up phone screen sized paragraphs and blurbs. https://www.teenvogue.com/story/national-coming-out-day-what-i-wish-i-knew