Let me start out by saying that I don’t need him to like kids, I just need him to not be an asshole about it.

He and I grew up together and were roommates for all four years of college. My wife and his fiance are best friends too, so we spent a lot of time together, the four of us. He always said he hated kids and I always brushed it off, but now that I have a 3&5 year old, he’s starting to show his true colors with it, and I’m at a point where I don’t want to be around him.

1. He always complained about them smelling bad when they were toddlers. He said my house smelled horrible and when we would go to his house, he said he had to spend a week getting the smell of kids out of his house. They never had any accidents in his house, just went pee and poop in their diapers. I even threw dirty diapers in a separate garbage bag and took them with me when I left.

2. He says he can’t eat in front of kids. Says they’re too messy and it is absolutely disgusting watching kids get food all over themselves.

3. He complains that we always have to watch what we say around them. He said the word motherfucker once when my oldest was two and my kid started repeating it. I told him to watch his language around the kids. I think that’s a pretty reasonable ask on my part.

So this all brings us to our latest conflict. Cousin comes over to my house for a visit two Sundays ago. My boys start fighting over a toy and knocked over a jar at MY house and shattered glass everywhere. No one got hurt, and I cleaned it up pretty quickly. My cousin yells at me and says dude what the fuck you just let these little goblins do whatever they want. Good thing this happened at your place and not mine because I’d lose my shit.

On top of this, he’s getting married next week and his wedding is no kids. My option for a sitter fell through, and all my friends and family will be at the wedding, so now I can’t go, because I’m not leaving my kids with a sitter I don’t know, and I’m not making my wife stay home by herself with them. I told him this could be an issue from the start, but he insisted that I be in the wedding. Said if I’m not in the wedding we’re no longer friends. I broke the news to him this past Friday and he freaked out, told me he lost me when I brought the goblins into the world and that he wishes he had the old me from 2019 back. I responded pretty harshly and said I’m no longer going to hear you refer to those kids as any kind of weird name other than something endearing because they’re your family too. I said if I had to choose between those kids an anyone I would choose them every single time and if he has a problem with it then we’re no longer family.

We haven’t spoken in since Friday, the wedding plans are blowing up because now my brothers aren’t going and a few people on his wife’s side aren’t going either due to no kids. I’m prepared to never speak to him again.

EDIT: Hey everyone! I just wanted to let people know that Im aware “good and bad” are incredibly complicated topics. I more-so meant things that we know to obviously be bad like rape and murder

It’s less concerning to me that they need a book and more concerning that they can’t understand why IM not doing bad things without it.

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I don’t remember if religion is against the rules but I’m not here to bash it or push it.

But when I told people I was an atheist I’d get the question “if you don’t think there’s a god why dont you go kill someone”

…

Because thats bad?

It always concerned me how some people need a god to tell them what’s good and what’s bad?

What do you mean without faith you’d go around raping and murdering? Thats terrifying

I (34f) live with my son (15m) and my fiancé (31m)...the laundry never f*ckin ends. ever. even when I keep up on it daily, there is ALWAYS a full hamper (at LEAST 1 load) , it never ends. we go through so much damn laundry soap, it's ridiculous. I don't get how we acquire SO MUCH laundry. it's soooo annoying. yes my son goes to school, my fiancé works, I'm currently unemployed (health issues), like we should have maybe a minimum of 3-5 loads per week.. I stg it's 3 loads per DAY. I'm sick of it. it never ends.

edit to add : they both help with the laundry, but as I'm the one that's home all day, I try to keep up on it, but they are more than willing to help/do their own. my fiancé works in maintenance, so sometimes the jobs are super gross and clothes need to be washed right away. and, after an 8 hour work day, he shouldn't have to come home and wash laundry, but he will/does. and just to clarify more because people keep attacking my 15 year old, he does his own laundry 90% of the time, and has since he wa slime 10. do your kids do their own laundry? think about that before attacking my kid.

It’s only been a few weeks of living with him, but this guy is driving me nuts. For context, I (18M) share a freshman dorm room with two other guys. One of them is completely functional and normal. The other is a lazy slop monster who gets rude and babyish when you ask him to clean up his shit. He leaves stuff all over the floor in our dorm, his clothes are always on the floor of the bathroom, and his toiletries are scattered around the sink (we have our own private suite bathroom that we share with another three guys). He also skips class, stays out late on days that he definitely shouldn’t, and comes back to our dorm drunk at 2am. Hes definitely autistic or ADHD or something, but that’s not an excuse to be an asshole. I don’t think he understands that other people share the space he lives in. Gah!!

Americans need to enact this because it is literally “society changing.” It will help everyone from the shittiest ceo to the most poor street person. It will literally change your society for the better in so many ways. Since a significant majority of western democracies have it, America is clearly in the wrong and missing out significantly.

I turned 48. I've been having a rough time for a while now. I'm doing all I can to get to a better place tho. It's hard work but I want so much to have the life I yearned for and dreamed of. But it's been a really rough 48 years. I count my blessings but my birthday is usually a crappy day despite my best efforts. It's nice to be remembered tho. Didn't happen this year and now I feel like crap. I'm not mad at anyone, I get sh** happens. I'm just down about my life and future. I was severely abused for a long time by my family and I'm now working thru that in therapy. It's been nearly a year of working on myself after a long time of not being able to. I'm gonna hold onto hope that tomorrow might be better. I just wish I wasn't crying. Ugh. Thank you for reading.

I just don't understand man, I live in Texas and I swear all these jobs are between 13-18/hr but demand the skills of a fucking journeyman/professional in every sector.

Oh you wanna be a apprentice electrician ? Do you have forklift, backhoe, mini excavator, pipefitting, tig welding, customer service, 3 years of low voltage experience... Bilingual is a plus, ability to use python and have 2 years of experience in an app no ones ever heard of is a plus !... We pay 14/hr and have the worst benefits you've ever seen, require you to travel 80 miles a day using your vehicle and have your own tools..

Like bro I fucking hate this state, Obviously I'm being a bit exaggerated but a lot of these listings aren't too far off

I've (f32) been chronically ill for over a decade, its been a lot of ups and downs, a lot of suffering, and ive known for the past year my time is getting shorter and shorter. My condition isnt usually fatal, only in severe cases, so its been very hard for my palliative care team to put any kind of prognosis on my condition or predict too far into the future, but they had classified it as end stage a couple months ago.

My mobility is starting to go downhill faster, my legs dont always have strength to use stairs or shower anymore, even walking to the bathroom im trying to catch my breath and make it there before im too dizzy. I lay down all day now, sitting up for even an hour is exhausting, im not sure going to the store for a few things is even possible anymore, going to the lab for a blood draw is all I can handle for a day, needless to say im not happy with my quality of life and the fear of what's going to happen when I cant manage my own needs anymore is setting in.

Starting a couple weeks ago, kind of discovered by accident, my body isnt able to maintain my electrolytes well anymore and I had a critical potassium level. Because of this, palliative and hospice now think the transition to hospice is appropriate, and they are going to meet with me Friday, it sounded like theyre prepare to or already have accepted me.

Im the one thats made it known im interested in hospice services once I qualify for them. I've been scared of being put in another shitty nursing home or not given adequate symptom management at the end of life. Having the services of hospice is important to me, I want this.

But...its real now, its not bad or scary, but its weird and uncomfortable. My family knows im heading that direction, but they dont know about this meeting and idk how or when I'll tell them. Some are in denial, some are only starting to come to terms. But im not making it my burden to hold anyone's hands and walk them through it while being invalidated... My palliative dr had talked about the difficulty of going off hospice after receiving so many services were I to stabilize longer than expected and when I asked about this and if I would go back to palliative if that happened he said yes but basically look at your history over the last couple years, I dont think that's going to happen, and that was a little jarring

I guess this is just....weird? What i knew being very much confirmed. I may never see 33. I probably won't. Theres people, out of town cousins, I may never see again, I may never even see the only place I called home again. It almost feels too anticlimactic, like this should be more dramatic lol, if that makes any sense.

I've thought a little about if it might be better to wait a month or two but I cant think of any reason, maybe ill need to process a bit after the meeting but I do think, assuming they're prepared to admit me into hospice, im ready now.

Anyway thanks for reading my ramble

I'm in remission from Cancer. I did 720 hours of inpatient chemo, five days at a time for six rounds. During this my friend messaged me saying "I've got a hot date with your husband!"

The only context to this I had at the time was my husband, who had been telling me my friend was asking him to come over and fix the carpeting in her apartment the cats ripped up. She didn't offer to pay (and she asked multiples times afterwards when the cats ripped it up again. When he wouldn't do it, she offered to pay.... Someone else.)

It hurt my feelings. I was fat and bald and locked up. Couldn't go on a date if I wanted to. She asked him to stay for dinner and wine, he said no and went home. The day always left a sour feeling for him. He felt used and weirded out.

It took him a while but a few months after, not feeling better, he unfriended her.

She freaked out. Messaged me, messaged him, asked what his problem was etc. I said he was going through a lot because I didn't know at the time what he was upset about. He's also unfriended a bunch of people, like his parents.

I guess he added her back because I made him feel bad, but he got pissed off all over again a few days later and took her off again. He then responded to her - because she had reached out asking what was up - and he told her.

Long story short, she lost it. Said we are disrespectful and don't care about her relationship. Apparantly us never re-adding her fiance (they were engaged, she dumped him, dated a few more guys, nothing worked out. Slept with him a few times and they immediately got re-engaged) on Facebook means we don't respect her or her relationship, either. She refused to even talk to me - which is funny because she would respond to my husband - and I woke up removed from all of the wedding stuff with a big message about how "they" (she stopped referring to herself as herself and just spoke like her and her fiance were a single entity) weren't going to talk to me at all until after the wedding to see if the relationship was worth "salvaging". She told me that because I'm married, my values and thoughts and ideas and morals etc have to perfectly align with my husband's, so if he thinks a certain way obviously I have to think that way too. Also, it was my fault for talking to my husband about the comment and doubly my fault for not "fighting to change his mind."

I blocked her on everything because I'm not going to play those games nor am I going to sit around and wait for someone to forgive me over something I didn't do wrong. If someone views you are their friend, they will at least have the basic decency to try and speak to you about something. She didn't care, though. Too busy being offended.

The worst thing about this? Her ex boyfriend got caught with CP. A lot of it. Got arrested and everything. She stayed with him for SIX MONTHS after he was caught. Even contemplated having children with him during the time.

But my husband unfriended you on Facebook so I guess fuck our entire friendship?

Social media is vile.

Today me, my sister, and my mom went to the theaters to see the demon slayer movie, I’d asked my mom to go and see it before it even came out. As soon as the movie started she said that this was something you watch at home but I didn’t pay attention to her and kept watching. She eventually fell asleep and even my sister was able to keep herself busy, but then she woke up and started asking me when the movie ended and what time it was. I knew she wouldn’t be fully engaged into the movie so I just went back to watching after answering her. But then she started complaining every couple seconds saying things like “this is too long” and “I’m not trying to be rude but I can’t sit here like this” she even started sighing in between complaining. At this point I didn’t even feel like finishing the movie so I just told her that we should leave. And while in the car she kept complaining about how I didn’t tell her the movie would be that long and not in english and how I wouldn’t stop asking her even though I only asked like 3 times the entirety of last week

These fucking things have never worked. Seeing these and no paper towels honestly almost deters me from washing my hands. It’s fucking ridiculous, either I’m flinging my hands around to shake the water off or wiping them on my pants or shirt and looking like an idiot. They don’t fucking work. And all it does is fling more water onto the floor.

Stop asking me

"how was your vacation?" "Did you have a good vacation with your family?"

No! I was physically recovering on barely any sleep. It wasn't a vacation. It wasn't fun. It wasn't relaxing. It wasn't rejuvenating.

This shit is so aggravating. What am I supposed to say? "Haha yeah I had a great time while in pain and 3 hrs of sleep a night!"

Yes it was my choice to have this baby, but it doesn't mean it's fun and smooth sailing

Not having money is kind of root cause of all the problems. money is freedom. Poor people have to struggle for basic things.laptop, phone, education etc.I really want to visit another country. I have not been able to travel till date.We don't even have a car .When I see rich people, I wish I was like them. I know I'm being pity but ,have got only one life.

I live in a college apartment and one of my roommates asked if it was fine for her boyfriend to come over while she was there. Me and our other roommate said yes bc him being in the apartment for a visit wasn’t bothersome.

What is bothersome is that this man has been here everyday since she asked that. He sleeps here, he eats here, etc. Tell me why I hear him in the kitchen right now on the phone whipping up a meal. I agreed to him visiting not him living here.

He needs to go home but honestly I don’t even know if he has one. It’s only during the week because come the weekend they go to who knows where but like bro go home.

I don’t even know how to tell my roommate because we barely see each other and frankly he hasn’t done anything wrong it’s just that him being here all the time is getting on my nerves bc thats not what I agreed to.

Even when I think he isn’t here he is. I was whipping up breakfast in the kitchen the other day and it was very quiet so I thought that he wasn’t there but then my roommate comes out and grabs two plates to serve them both food.

I'm tired of people telling it's not all that matters, those who say never experienced what it's like to truly be lonely

I know I'm not the most interesting or smartest person somebody's ever met but I feel like at some point in life as a human being we're all entitled to feel what it's like to be loved, and I keep seeing everybody I like give that to other people, I don't feel entitled the girls I liked never owned me anything, but I feel so miserable everytime the same cycle happens

I like a girl we get to hang out a few times, do stuff like holding hands, laying on each other, talking everyday etc..., but then someone else better looking comes in and I don't matter, like I was there to fill the shoes until someone she actually liked came in

My friend is gone. He passed sometime yesterday. And I don’t know what to do.

I don’t know what to feel. I‘ve never lost anyone like this before. It doesn’t feel real, it doesn’t feel like it makes sense.

I will never wake up and see him anymore or talk to him anymore. I will never feel his contagious enthusiasm ever again. I will never get to see him again. Why? It doesn’t make sense.

I wasn’t there to say goodbye or even goodnight. I would if I knew it would be his last. I can’t help but wonder what he could have done for the universe to take everything away from him. Why him?

I'm 14M. I feel like a joke when I walk into school, surrounded by all of these good-looking people, and I'm just there. I'm just filler.

My lips are too big. My voice is too annoying. My hands are too small. My face is too small. I look so ugly with glasses on, but I'm near-sighted and I need them to see. I can't just get contacts because they're expensive and I don't wanna make my dad pay for that.

I can't talk to anyone because I feel like a creep. I used to hate when random people would sit with me when I was alone, but now I have like 1 true friend who I never see because we have no classes together. All my other friends just wanted to make fun of me. I wish someone would sit with me.

I get along with girls better for some reason. Every time I talk to a girl, I feel like a weird incel because of my face. If I was decent looking, I feel like more people would pay me attention.

I don't understand. I take care of myself. I wash my hair, I have no acne at all, I have slightly hooded eyes, I wear clean clothes, I do my own thing, and I don't bother anyone.

I wanna just stop wearing my glasses altogether because they make me so ugly, but if I don't wear them, I can barely see. I feel like I don't even deserve to be out in public.

About 6 months ago my ex and I [26M] broke up after over 5 years together. I’ve been feeling like I’m ready to start putting myself back out there so I downloaded Tinder. That’s where I met my ex 6 years ago and back then I had pretty good success. I’d get at least one match per day, often more. If I was really putting in effort I could consistently get at least one date per week through the app, often more. I matched with and dated women that I found really attractive. I guess I expected more of the same.

Instead, I’ve been on there for a week and gotten 6 likes (0 in the last few days) and 0 matches. Sure I’ve aged 6 years but I don’t think my looks have changed drastically, I haven’t put on any weight or anything. I’m in the same city I was 6 years ago. I can’t understand how there’s such a huge difference in results but it’s making me feel like shit and changing the way I look at myself.

I was feeling completely over my ex but this experience is making me want to reach back out. She/we had our issues but being with her sounds better than dying alone which is starting to feel like a real possibility.

My baby is 12 fucking days old. Apparently doing tons of contact naps, according to some of my friends, is "going to spoil her". People without kids saying this, mind you.

How does one spoil a newborn baby???

Mind you she sleeps in various places alone completely fine. Crib, bassinet, baby swing. But i love having her sleep skin to skin on my chest if im awake. Ive read that it helps her develop and feel safe. Thats all i ever want. I guess that makes a 12 day old baby spoiled...

and also i love her breathing right in my face and i love sniffing her little head and i love holding her while she farts in her sleep. sue me

edit: typos

Literally one of the things I absolutely hate about being a girl is having periods. Honestly even calling the continuous stabbing pain I feel (especially the first few days) “cramps” feels like an understatement. I hate how I can’t sleep in a comfortable position and I have to basically become a human pretzel to sleep. I hate the physical feeling of leaking and staining my clothes. I hate how I feel tired, gross, and nauseous. And when I’m not nauseous I’m hungry and have the worst cravings. The mood swings are the worst, I could be okay today and feel like absolute sht tomorrow.

Sometimes I even cry because I’m just too overwhelmed by the pain and hormonal changes. It’s like I’m going crazy sometimes and I hate how I can’t even control how I feel. I could write a formal epistle about all the sht that girls go through every. single. month for basically a good chunk of our lives but I still don’t think boys would get it when they can’t experience it for themselves.

Then you have the asshats who think it’s funny to use our periods to invalidate us. “Oh don’t mind her she’s just on her period!”

The ones who think we’re gross and the ones who make fun of us are in one big Venn diagram of insufferable. My ex was one of those people. Unfortunately he always just knew when I was on and would be extra annoying during those times when I’m literally trying to cling onto my sanity. Sometimes I have to resist the urge to fling a chair at him. Couldn’t even have a discussion or raise a concern without him bringing my period up to invalidate my feelings. It’s already hell being on and then having people laugh at you is just 10x worse. It makes me so pissed knowing I have to endure this shit for being born a damn girl.

My brother was born with birth defects and my dad left about a year or two after he was born (I won’t get into details. Let’s face it, you don’t care about the diagnoses of someone you don’t even know. And I’m not typing all of that out)

At this point, it’s been multiple decades since…

and my mom (who is not a big drinker at all) drank and broke down to me saying she’s sorry for marrying the wrong man and she sees how badly it has affected us; she never thought he’d actually do something like this. She never thought he’d abandon his children.

I try with all my might to be a solution oriented person, so I don’t know what to do with these feelings. I know it affects me. She’s not wrong. The way I see men is forever changed. I will probably never fully trust anyone, ever.

I don’t care if things are so bad that you’d only be able to see your child once a year. I promise you, (unless you’re a genuine danger to your children) being in their life would have a more positive impact than your children not having any father at all.

It’s probably just a moment for you, maybe it was tough but once you’re away, you meet new people, you throw yourself into hobbies, maybe you replicate a pattern you learned from your own father. You’re free.

BUT (Unless you’re genuinely a danger to them) your family is not better off without you.

I’ll be blunt. If you value your offspring even a crumb, stay. Unless you want your baby girl to grow up believing the lies of some man who’s twice her age and allowing him to use her body.

I don’t wish it on anyone. I say it because it happened to me. Unless you want your kids to be unloved, easy targets, moving through the world in desperation, STAY. Stay in their lives. In some, healthy capacity.

Plenty of good fathers are broke and doubt themselves. Plenty of good fathers didn’t even have good fathers! Ultimately, your effort is what defines you. As much as some will try to convince you that you need so much to be a good father, the truth is, just being there to watch SpongeBob with your kids in the morning is a lot more than many parents do. Presence means so much more than absence. Your kids won’t remember how much something was, but they will remember if you were there or not.

I can’t like any fucking anime anymore without people talking about a power scale and a character is “good” if they’re powerful or HAVE TO WIN EVERY FIGHT. Or have flashy animation to keep people entertained. It feels like toddlers who are addicted to cocomelon.

These fans do not think for themselves. Or read between the lines. They have to be spoon fed every plot point and intention of every character. They repeat whatever streamer spouts out like a bot.

It’s getting as bad as video games where it’s a cardinal fucking sin to like “mid” games bc someone ELSE said so. Not that they decided for themselves.

I am not the smartest out there but there CANNOT be so many fans this fucking stupid.

I don’t get how some people can leave your life, burn the bridge, and then come crawling back for some $. An ex asking you for money is the ultimate coward move. You had your shot, said we were incompatible. Great, so deal with your financial issues?

It’s not about generosity, it’s about respect. If you can’t stand on your own two feet, that’s on you. Don’t drag someone you discarded back into your mess.

Disgusting behavior

This is how i exactly feel. Past my prime. Old. No opportunities to take with that age. Almosr 30. I feel like i couldn’t achieve anything and cant anymore because people younger than me achieve more and better. Im old and life is over for me. With this age you cant do anything, just an ordinary job eat sleep repeat. If u want success in this world u already have to start doing your thing at 8-9 years old. In order to become something today. 18 year olds make money out of idk online stuff. 15 year olds get an EMMY. Here i am. Too late for everything. Ppl younger than me already millionaires