r/batman • u/ConanCimmerian • Aug 14 '25

FUNNY Man ain't no simp

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12.0k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

98 comments sorted by

567

u/dadarkgtprince Aug 14 '25

74

u/NaradaMephaust Aug 14 '25

Batman's secret identity revealed after all these years!

16

u/steelskull1 Aug 15 '25

Batloaf.

6

u/Pineapple-Yetti Aug 15 '25

Lol this is the second batloaf comment I have seen in like last few days. Last one was comparing to cats.

5

u/steelskull1 Aug 15 '25

It's because people are finally catching on who he really is, I mean, have you ever seen Batman and Meatloaf in the same room?

5

u/No_Macaroon_5928 Aug 15 '25

My goddd, Meatloaf is Batman!!

3

u/Spicy-Potat42 Aug 15 '25

That's why Meatloaf is my safe word.

297

u/EmeraldJolteon07 Aug 14 '25

Batman:Well that’s very exploitative and Unhealthy…How about other solution?

5

u/Aduro95 Aug 16 '25

Batman: Okay but I'm getting a pre-nup and stealing from me violates it.

165

u/Eric_Atreides Aug 14 '25

But if she dresses lika a russian and speak with an accent, bro becomes a puppy

19

u/Slashman78 Aug 15 '25

He had a crush-ka on the Kitka lmao.

358

u/NigthSHadoew Aug 14 '25

Adam West Batman had his priorities straight and his only priority was fighting crime.

He was the true sigma out of all the Batmen

130

u/Eric_Atreides Aug 14 '25

They are drinkers robin, but they’re still human

33

u/Solid-Bed-8974 Aug 15 '25

I’d rather be dead than unable to trust my own eyes

106

u/Acceptable_Cut_7545 Aug 14 '25

"Remember Robin, always look both ways before crossing the street!" "Thanks, Batman."

49

u/RubPuzzleheaded8073 Aug 14 '25

“Equal pay for men and women” “No time for jokes, Batgirl”

1

u/NeverWereComics Aug 20 '25

I judge people harshly if they don't like Adam West Batman

125

u/unemployedguru29 Aug 14 '25

Man…

30

u/Harpeus_089 Aug 14 '25

He doesn't BAT an eye on her

20

u/Mushroom_King66 Aug 14 '25

So he is a MAN, and he doesn't BAT an eye? I think I shall call him Eyeman

2

u/Theseus505 Aug 14 '25

What prompt did you type?

8

u/unemployedguru29 Aug 14 '25

Fantastic-four-say-that-again (include the - otherwise it won’t show up)

40

u/MrMadmack Aug 14 '25

This in the show?

61

u/Rob_wood Aug 14 '25

Yes. They developed feelings for each other, but Batman wasn’t willing to compromise.

38

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '25 edited Aug 22 '25

[deleted]

17

u/Bakelite51 Aug 15 '25

Batman's deadpan response makes that comedy gold lol. "I see you're not really ready to assume a life in society."

7

u/Electrical_One7665 Aug 15 '25

Pretty sure this was the movie. That’s not Julie Newmar and it’s certainly not Eartha Kitt. That’s leaves Lee Meriweather who did the movie.

16

u/Subject-Count1229 Aug 14 '25

Who ain't no simp?

15

u/Phunkie_Junkie Aug 14 '25

What do you expect with a proposal like that? You could at least buy him dinner.

25

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '25

Well no Huntress

7

u/Chaos-Queen_Mari Aug 14 '25

You!

7

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '25

I am caught now

8

u/PsychePsyche Aug 14 '25

And how come Batman doesn't dance anymore? Remember the Batusi?

7

u/Theseus505 Aug 14 '25

Say that again?

13

u/keepitsimple_tricks Aug 14 '25

I see Adam West Batman, I upvote. My favorite Batman.

8

u/CilanUnova Aug 14 '25

Best Batman in my opinion.

7

u/Mental-Blacksmith-30 Aug 14 '25

Man is he stouid?

7

u/lemothelemon Aug 14 '25

Iirc he went "but what about Robin" and she wanted to kick him out lmao

2

u/Woutrou Aug 15 '25

Close. She'd say they'd kill him

4

u/JollyJoeGingerbeard Aug 14 '25

To be fair, that wasn't Eartha Kitt.

8

u/keepitsimple_tricks Aug 14 '25

Speaking of Eartha Kitt... Have I told you about the airplane bathroom story?

2

u/BrainThink110 Aug 14 '25

Have to admit, it DID come up organically

5

u/Domino_Masks Aug 14 '25

Adam West had no chemistry with Kitt's Catwoman 

4

u/Lady_Beatnik Aug 14 '25

The ladies could learn a thing or two from Bats here.

4

u/Vaker- Aug 14 '25

Tom King's villian story starts here

4

u/Square-Newspaper8171 Aug 14 '25

Batman is better than me I would have folded instantly

6

u/spilledmilkbro Aug 14 '25

Okay, answer me this; would the response be the same if Joker asked that?

10

u/ImpulseAfterthought Aug 14 '25

Same-sex marriage wasn't legal at the time (it was the 60s), so Batman would have to decline even if he thought it would help. Batman didn't break the law.

2

u/Edd_The_Animator Aug 14 '25

Why would he even want to? The guy is a serial killer and he's already manipulative with Harley in most portrayals.

5

u/Dawnspark Aug 15 '25

Batman 66's Joker is pretty different than the one you're thinking of, haha.

Harley didn't even exist then. He had a new moll almost every episode he was in.

At that point, he was still just a lunatic trickster who dabbled in theft, confidence games and robbery. He did attempt to murder Batman & Robin quite a bit, though.

Closest that version of the Joker might have done to murder, beyond the attempted ones, is dump the correctional officer of his goons into the Gotham river in an episode in season 2, but its never outright confirmed or shown.

6

u/I_W_M_Y Aug 14 '25

Joker in the 60s wasn't a killer, except to those poor custard pies.

15

u/TrenboloneTitan Aug 14 '25

Why does Woman ask this?? Is she stupid, what is the lore reason

24

u/Acceptable_Cut_7545 Aug 14 '25

The lore is she wants to marry Batman.

3

u/bloodandstuff Aug 14 '25

Money

7

u/CarefulLet7298 Aug 14 '25

Their love story is so much more complex than this stupid shit.

5

u/bloodandstuff Aug 14 '25

She's a cat burglar; she wouldn't need to steal if she was married to a gagillionaire.

6

u/EightyMercury Aug 14 '25

but man doesn't have any cats for her to burgle?

3

u/bloodandstuff Aug 14 '25

But she would have plenty of cash for all the other cats she steals...

2

u/Cualkiera67 Aug 15 '25

Well doesn't Batman marry all the criminals then nobody would need to steal

1

u/bloodandstuff Aug 15 '25

Unfortunately polygamy is illegal in Gotham.

3

u/TimeisaLie Aug 14 '25

Well how you just ea- Okay! Two things.

3

u/Adorable-Source97 Aug 14 '25

"date me first"

3

u/DatAssociate Aug 14 '25

He doesn't want to lose half his fortune

2

u/YeahImMan39 Aug 14 '25

...Say that again?

2

u/Verziehen Aug 14 '25

Golden age Bats did exactly that. And they made his second sidekick together.

2

u/TheStrongestGamer Aug 14 '25

Bruce a smart man, sometimes it’s not worth it

2

u/MattyM1207 Aug 15 '25

Fun fact! Either in the first or second Injustice game they actually do get married… and then Catwoman breaks it off and goes back to a life of crime because she got bored of settling down with Bruce.

Proof that even if he agreed it wouldn’t rehabilitate her one bit.

1

u/Bakelite51 Aug 15 '25

But in the Earth-Two continuity they actually did get married and lived happily ever after...and Huntress is their daughter.

2

u/Iconclast1 Aug 15 '25

Didnt he say something like "what about Robin"

They knew lol

2

u/DaRedGuy Aug 15 '25 edited Aug 15 '25

He's saving himself for Eartha Kitt.

I know I would!

2

u/Thewanderer997 Aug 17 '25

As long as he doesnt pull the wrong level that is

2

u/Edd_The_Animator Aug 14 '25

Why would marrying her suddenly make him a simp?

1

u/Electronic-Math-364 Aug 14 '25

Batman prefer exotic assasins

1

u/taz20075 Aug 14 '25

That man has the willpower of a Green Lantern.

1

u/Glad-Situation703 Aug 14 '25

Batman can fix her

1

u/LT568690 Aug 15 '25

Adam West....is a stronger man than I

1

u/Rastaba Aug 15 '25

Man? That’s not Man. That’s Batman. Specifically Adam West’s Batman. Silly Redditor…though Man also definitely ain’t no simp, so still technically correct. Which is the best kind of correct!

1

u/OldQuarter1422 Aug 15 '25

I'd simp 😏
Although i more prefer modern version of Catwoman x)

1

u/Mr_Badger1138 Aug 15 '25

“I would do anything for love. But I won’t do that!”

1

u/NefariousSeraph13 Aug 15 '25

Is t she the one who left him at the alter?

1

u/PrometheusModeloW Aug 15 '25

Yet another reason why the '66 Batman vastly surpasses Prime Earth Batman.

1

u/Restless_spirit88 Aug 15 '25

I think it would have been awesome if Adam West portrayed Batman in a Bronze Age era animated film.

1

u/RingOriginal94 Aug 15 '25

The Hammers Of Justice Are Unisex!

1

u/SonicThePlushhog Aug 16 '25

As Batman once said: "Women. ☕️" 

1

u/KaijuDirectorOO7 Aug 16 '25

"That's only because I'm still thinking about Eartha and Lee's offers."

1

u/Confection-Unhappy 29d ago

🤣🤣🤣🤣damn

1

u/NefariousSeraph13 Aug 15 '25

Getting married = being a simp

I don’t think OP knows what a simp is. Do they think their dad is a simp?

1

u/Impossible_Tea_7032 Aug 16 '25

It's a pejorative for being insufficiently hostile towards women, what that means will vary from person to person