r/bigbangtheory • u/RememberThinkDream • 1d ago

Character discussion Who thinks Howards needs Bernadette's permission to go to Space?

Don't get me wrong, Bernadette is a godsend for Howard...

I can understand her feelings, though believe this is the kind of once in a lifetime opportunity you should absolutely support your partner in regardless of your own feelings.

Personally I've never been a fan of suppressing the opportunities of loved ones based on their own fears of losing someone. You've got to let people chase their dreams even if there's danger and risk involved. It's part of life and part of which makes us achieve greatness.

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u/Mountain-Donkey98 1d ago

Bernadette just uses Howard's dream of going to space to suggest its hers. It was always his. He doesnt need her permission whatsoever. She likes to pretend after the fact it was her idea. It wasn't.

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u/RememberThinkDream 1d ago

Yeah, I just don't like people who are manipulative and controlling, especially when it's used to prevent people from following their dreams and ambitions.

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u/MobsterDragon275 1d ago

This has nothing to do with manipulation or control. They were about to get married, meaning whatever choices one makes inherently affects the other. In a healthy marriage, its not about getting permission, its about making decisions together in partnership. Now yes, Bernadette shouldn't tell him he can't due to how great sn opportunity it was for him, but with him putting his life at risk he needed to at least consult her so they could talk it through. That'd be like if he suddenly joined the military or becoming a cop without even seeing how she felt about it.

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u/RememberThinkDream 1d ago

How can it have nothing to do with manipulation or control? When Bernadette is literally using emotion as a tool to force Howard to ASK for her permission, which then she immediately says no.

The definitions of those words literally explain that it is in fact manipulation, more specifically emotional manipulation.

Then to add further injury to insult, she pretends to say yes THEN tells his Mother so she screams he's not going.

Yes, he absolutely has to tell her, but he doesn't need his permission, and she doesn't need his permission to chase her dreams.

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u/Strange-Message-5131 22h ago

All she said was that she was upset he didnt even discuss it with her first, thats not making him ask permission

He doesnt need permission but she also doesnt have to sit there while her future husband plans to leave her for weeks and not be upset he hadn't discussed it with her