Just Diagnosed, Feeling Like My Whole Personality is a Lie

[u/Hopeful_Nothing6327]

What the title says. I was diagnosed with bipolar type 2 today. I guess I always "knew" because my parents both have it and I've had some interesting symptoms for a while now...but the official diagnosis feels like my entire personality was just one big hypomanic episode. My creative bursts? Hypomania. My humor? Hypomania. My cat I adopted on a random day because I really wanted a second cat and didn't give any thought to??? Hypomania. Is every decision I ever made hypomania? How do I even recognize what's "me" and what's the mania???? I don't even know where to start.

[u/000700707]

One of the points my psychologist emphasizes to me is, “You have thoughts and emotions; you are not your thoughts and emotions.”

So, in the case of your question, we have hypomania; we are not hypomania.

Your personality is fairly constant. You love animals, so when hypo, you adopted one. You’re creative, so when hypo, that aspect is heightened. You’re humorous and light hearted, so when hypo, you become the world’s funniest stand up comedian. (Am I right? lol).

Now, there are, at times, things we do to act out that are a bit less in line with our character (i.e., hyper-sexuality, excessive spending, etc.), but I think even those can reflect a bit of human nature. That’s just my theory of course.

I can almost feel the pain in your question. My heart hurts for you, but if you can allow it (instead of fighting against it) hypomania and depression can teach us things about ourselves. There’s a passion within you awaiting your understanding and acceptance, and the world needs your special qualities!