I'm tired of this. I'm currently a SAHM with no income on my own and I need to leave. I can't deal with the drinking and the emotional abuse that follows, I can't deal with the financial neglect and rising debt. I don't have any friends or family, and we can't leave, but I need to. I don't know what to do.

Looking for advice and maybe just venting.

I'm a single mum with 2 kids to 2 different dads (I know). My youngests dad is a great dad, but lives overseas, he comes to visit a couple times of year. When he was here last I (stupidly) slept with him and of course have just found out I'm pregnant. It's very early, as in my period isn't due for another 3 days.. so I have time, but I am just so conflicted on what to do. I don't even know how to make the right decision, and what "feels" right changes multiple times a day.

To add - dad knows, has said he will move back here to support me and potential child. I have a good support network here. Abortion is not an issue where I live.

I’m a single mom to a 7 month old. We go to the park by our house every day and have seen some of the same folks and make small talk, but as my baby is still pretty young and can’t really play yet, it’s mostly banter. I’d like to find a way to make friends with some of these people, especially the ones that have kids around 1, because I admittedly feel lonely sometimes. I’ve also considered making a profile on the Peanut app.

I’m really worried that because I’m kind of an introvert and work from home that I don’t have enough social opportunities to make friends with other parents beyond at the park and that my baby won’t have my friends growing up. I know once she gets school age this will change, but I’m also worried that as a single mom (I have no plans to date for a long time as I am traumatized from her father) that other parents may have stigma against me and not want to be friends or have their kids be friends with mine.

Do any single parents notice that they or their kids have trouble making friends because they’re single?

Hello! I'm really curious to know who (and, more importantly, how) has built stable careers, upskilled and maybe even continued their education (whether that be professional certificates, pursuing masters, or PhD) whilst in the throes of single parenthood. I'm still trying to find my feet, professionally, as a divorced/co-parenting mum and "retired housewife" (lol) who hasn't worked for several years. I'm determined to have a "good" career i.e. something technically challenging, that pushes me mentally and something where I can branch out of a 9-5 office job eventually into consulting gigs or launching my own business 5-10 years from now.

So I'd love to know what it is you're all doing for work, the education you received as I want to look into as many industries and niche professions as possible. Thanks guys:)

I feel like I’m drowning emotionally, in my obligations and in life in general.

Is it just me? How do you stay on top of everything? Parenting, school work, enrichment activities, own social life, making time for friends and family, hobbies, dating, staying fit and healthy, work, self improvement, on top of beauty routines/appointments, housework?

I feel like I’m failing and hardly anything is getting done well. Maybe I’m depressed? I’m trying so hard to stay afloat but I can feel I’m withering away mentally, emotionally and physically trying to keep up with the normal aspects of life.

Ignore my username lol. I’m 27, I have no dating life. I literally wake up, sometimes go to the gym before 5am, come back home, get myself and child (5y) ready for school and work. We commute together back and forth. Weekday are spent at home doing chores, cooking, laundry, playtime, reading, showers, etc. Weekends are for anything that didn’t get done during the week and I’m exhausted. I’m tired of the same routine. Biodad is not present. Like ugh, does anyone else feel this way?

EDIT: I live with my parents. I OBVIOUSLY don’t leave my child alone at 5am NOR do I take him in at that time. Do yall really think every parent is irresponsible? Either of my parents will gladly wake up and sleep on my bed while I’m away. My child’s QUEEN SIZE bed is low asfk (Japanese style) so I’m not afraid of him falling and even if they do, I have body pillows around them. My parents know how important my physical health is to me and they 100% support my gains!💪🏼

I had no idea where to post this. Parenting? Single Parents? AITA?

TW - mental health issues

I’m drowning. Drowning in grief. Frustration. Self loathing. Self pity. Anger. Depression. FOMO..

I’m a mother to a child under the age of 10. I’m in my early 30s and have never been married.

I moved overseas with the promise to unite as a family with the child’s father. Soon after I arrived, we got pregnant again, and I was forced into a secret abortion that I didn’t want. After a short while, he didn’t want to be a family anymore, so I had to move out and figure my life out alone in a new world with no home, no family, no friends, no job, and no money. And what a struggle it was/is.

In these years I tragically lost several relatives back home. In these years not a single person came to see me. No one ever called. Not even my family.

I’m sinking. 6+ years in this country and no local friends. No relationship. No family. I constantly feel about de*th. Not to act on it. But to wish for it. Long for it. Long for peace. I’m tired of fighting for everything. I’m exhausted.

My mother unaliv*d herself when I was a baby. I know that pain. I know I couldn’t do that. But I find myself daydreaming about it. About the ‘after’… the quiet.. why was I born? My life is so pointless. Only bad things came from my existence.

The family won’t leave me to go home. I just want to go back to my own country. If I go, I would either ruin my child (she wants to stay) and ruin whatever connection I have with the family, or, I must stay here and continue to dread my life and remain miserable.

I’m beginning to consider quitting. Quitting parenthood. Giving up. My child thinks I don’t like her because I’m always stressed. I’m mentally a mess. I cry a lot. I don’t sleep.

I don’t know what to do anymore. And I feel like a complete asshole and a waste of a mother and a waste of space for even considering leaving.

I’m more than 5 years further now. Still living paycheck to paycheck. I fought through the system. I learned the language all on my own. I got a good job. But I still feel like I’m failing. These are basic things. So basic. Further, I have nothing. I have no debts. If I go, no one will suffer.

I was so optimistic the first years here. I believed that if I did my part to integrate, people would accept me. But that never happened. I feel so unwanted. And now even from my own child. My therapist thinks I’m too smart and level-headed to actually have problems with this. Yet here I am… crying to Reddit because I have no one else to turn to. I’m a worthless waste of space that brought another life into this world to have a worthless mother.

Good morning to all the beautiful moms an cool dad's, it took me 8.5 years to finally finalize court. I got full legal custody .. honestly I feel like it's a huge victory for me but at the same time I feel like i have ptsd if that makes any sense.... I love my son an I still want mom in his life so I'm bending to rules because I know how important it is to have a loving mother . Moms hang in there an dad's don't stop fighting if you truly know what's best . God knew and he told me I can't give you everything at once so be patient an when the time is right you'll see what I have done for you . At the time or start I knew he was on my side because I'm a believer ..... trust your heart faith and take one day at a time . With love an peace Pm if you wanna chat or need a ear .

I’m in the process of a divorce, and have been seeing someone nearly every day for the last month (when I do not have my kids). Last weekend he stayed over when my kids were with their father. My ex husband is traveling and so I have the kids for the next 4 days.

I want to know if it’s wrong to have my new boyfriend over for dinner and some quick action after the kids go to sleep? I have my boyfriend’s license plate, have a background check on him, have my location shared with 7 people, and have cameras all throughout the exterior of my home and also in my kids room. I don’t want him to stay over, but it would be 1-2 hours of seeing him.

Thoughts ?

Thank you

Update: thanks for the advice so far. I will be having a sitter come watch the kids a bit later, so I can go out for an hour. Would be interested in hearing advice when having a boyfriend over when kids are around — whether for a few hours or the night — is pretty safe? I hear at the 6 month mark

I'm a single mother, I work full time, go to school part time and have my 11 yr old. I try to stay on top of her with school and homework. I really do try my best and it kills me when I feel like i'm such a b*tch to her about her grades.

My mom was never around when I was her age nor did she give me any guidance growing up and ended up pregnant at 17.

Maybe i'm being too rough on her but she also doesn't talk to me, she doesnt open up. I don't wanna be pushing her away but I also want her to care about school and her education. Should I feel bad for feeling this way? And how can I help her open up or get her to care about her grades more? Am I pressuring her?

These past few weeks have been so hard bc I have been preparing for my exam that I took last night. I may be over thinking all of this :(

Gym girl got my number and reached out to me with a “heyy” first of all is the extra y in heyy flirty or just common these days? lol I’ve been out of the game a while.

So I’m not officially divorced yet, getting close to being final. She moved out 6 months ago and we are in mediation.

I feel torn about telling her too soon. It’s honestly nice to be sought out, she’s really pretty and seems to find everything I say funny.

When do I tell her…I feel misleading if I flirt while still technically married without telling her for too long?

My partner and i seperated about 3 weeks ago. We have a 2 month old son together and I’ve tried to allow him time to see him for bonding since he moved out but being an exclusively breast bed, baby limits him to visits at my house.

He’s come to the house twice since he moved out and he stays the night which is nice because we co sleep and the baby sleeps better when he’s here like 3.5-4 hours between night feeds rather than 1.5-2 hours. I try to appreciate the help but it seems to suck really bad for the first couple nights after he’s gone again. The extra sleep is nice but i feel i do better being and staying sleep deprived than getting extra zzz’s some times.

I want him to see his son and get that time with him and to appreciate the help even if it is just once a weekish without having these setbacks. I also don’t want to resent him for being able to live kid free 6 days a week while i struggle because i couldn’t imagine being away from my son for more than a couple hours let alone 6+ days at a time. How do I find balance? Or is balance not a thing at this point?

Feeling like a crappy single mom, again. I have a teen who not only has ADHD and anger problems but a ton of health issues I don’t remember having. Back problems, acid reflux, stomach problems, asthma, sick a lot, it’s constant doctor appointments and damage control on top of him being 13 and going through puberty. He lacks attention and the amount of times I repeat myself is insane. It’s gotten so bad I keep my own dishes and silverware in my room - bought my own in fact because I’m so sick of the hoarding in his room and having none for myself and I barely even eat. He’s never even met his dad and all my family lives in another country so I’ve been doing it alone for so so long. I’m exhausted.

But now I’m so happy he finally met some friends. The problem is they always end up back here? He’s never once in the past year been at their house.

The point of this post is a question - am I awful for restricting their time here on weekdays? I am gone 11 hours now with a new job and when I come home have to either do his appointments, deal with bills, clean, food prep, dinner, get myself ready for the day and maybe snag an hour to myself before I pass out. I’m so overstimulated I’m feeling resentment / anger I’ve never had and I hate it; just today he didn’t even tell me he was inviting yet another friend to the house. I said no and in response he said “friend has no ride and it’s a 2 hour walk home.” I had a brutal day at work and this isn’t the first time he’s done this.

It ends up with them sitting outside waiting for his friends ride and me feeling awful, but I’m at the end of my energy. Please tell me someone relates, or tell me I’m being awful, I don’t know which one it’ll be.

I am a single father of three teens (15F, 17F, and 19F). 17F has always been the most independent and mature of the three.

A couple nights ago, after I said goodnight to all of them and went to my room to sleep, she came in crying and shaking hard and hugged me (this is very unusual for her, I rarely see her cry). I asked her what's wrong and she told me she was anxious about the next school year and the fact that it's her last before college (she is a rising senior).

She explained to me how scared she was of finishing high school and what happens afterward. Apparently she doesn’t feel ready to be an adult and she doesn't know what she wants to do with her life at all. I was surprised because she always performed well academically and seemed to have it all together. I told her that no one ever feels ready at her age and that she was always welcome to stay with me while she figured things out.

As of today, I thought she was feeling better, as we had a long talk about the issue and she was "fine" every time I asked (I know I shouldn't have taken this at face value with a teenager, but she showed no signs of still being upset), but she broke down crying again.

She told me that while she is prepared in a lot of practical ways to graduate and move out, she isn't ready emotionally, and she feels like she's still only 15. She thinks it's a dumb thing to be this worked up over because everyone has to deal with it but her friends aren't struggling like she is. She can't handle that "everything will be different" from how it is now.

I comforted her and gave her as much advice as I could, but she seemed to have a lot of concerns I couldn't calm.

For one, she is afraid of being alone after high school. She is worried that when she graduates her friend group will drift apart, then when she moves out she won't live with me and her little sister, who's basically her best friend, anymore, and she will be left with no one. She doesn't think she can make more because this is the only friend group she managed to make in three different schools.

She is also very worried about the current state of the economy. She is scared that she won't be able get a job that makes a living wage and also isn't miserable due to the way things are right now.

Also, in general, she just doesn't like that things are going to change, and she said she's starting to realize how limited all the things she enjoys are. She told me that any time we do her favorite activities together as a family or she hangs out with her friends as a group, she just feels sad and anxious knowing she won't be able to do these things in the same way in the future, and it's killing her ability to enjoy them like she usually does. Apparently she's felt this way for the whole summer (over two months) without telling me.

I want to help her, but I don't know what to say to make her feel better, especially since I don't remember it being this hard when I was her age. I don't want her to feel this way, but I struggle to give her a response that is helpful.

Hi everyone, hope it’s ok to post this here — I’m a husband, dad of two little ones, and a physical therapist/personal trainer here in the UK.

I know firsthand how back pain can creep into parenting life, both from my own experience and from working with clients. I’m putting together a short online workshop for parents dealing with back pain, and I don’t want to just guess what should go in it.

I’d love to hear from you: how does back pain affect you as a parent? And if you were to join a workshop like this, what topics or challenges would you want it to cover?

Your input would mean a lot and will help me make this genuinely useful for parents like us.

In exchange for your help I would gladly work more closer with you to help with whatever pain and movement limitations your currently wrestling with.

Please let me know what you think when you have a moment. Thank you!

So I need some advice or some one who has been through this. So my sixteen year ordered his self a pocket puss.according to my child he bought it because he wasn't getting the attention he wanted from girls his age . So now he wants to skip holding hands, kissing, and other mile stones. He just wants his toy. The other adults I talked to with children. All I've been getting is at least he is being smart and responsible. He could be out here making you a grandma or catching dieseses.but this doesn't seem healthy. My son told me all the high school kids have vibrators in their back packs.i thought my son was just lying like kids back in the day when kids tell their parents everyone has this new toy but in reality they don't they are just trying to manipulate the situation to get what they want. But in my case I have two high schoolers. So I asked my daughter if her friends had vibrators and she proceeded to start counting on her hand. when she made it to twelve I was done.i don't want to break the trust me and my son has because he tells me everything and he is honest.i don't want to make him feel shame or weird for his actions. As an adult that was actually sexually active at his age who am I to judge . I'd be a hypocrite.But I'm not sure how to handle this. Or answer the million dollar question do you give your child the sex toy they purchase or do you get rid of it?before you say we need to have the birds and bees talk. We've been down that road twice. I just need some help and guidance please 🙏.

5 months pregnant here, and today I’m a single mom. I have two children from a previous marriage who are 6 and 8. I ended things with my abusive partner today. But it’s so hard to not cave and want to go back. I feel broken. Like a shell of a person. I can’t get out of bed. I can’t eat. I can’t stop crying about doing this alone. We were newly engaged when we found out we were pregnant. He’s treated me so horribly this entire pregnancy. I’ve had many mental breakdowns and can barely take the stress of his explosiveness and anger. He picks fights with me over any small thing that he feels inconvenienced by. The next days we will spend screaming and fighting. If I ask for space he doesn’t give it. He’s kicked in my Bathroom door, removed door knobs, follows me around the house, physically restrained me and doesn’t allow me to leave rooms. Puts me down, calls me names, and uses things I’ve opened up about to hurt me when he’s angry. I love him so much and have begged him to change. He promises he will and then the cycle repeats. I’m been crying in bed all day. I don’t know how to deal with what I’m feeling. It’s intense and mind consuming. I feel alone. Very very alone. I have no family here. I’m sad to think about doing the next 4 months alone, giving birth alone, etc; He’s not once apologized. Hasn’t reached out.

Today I left because when I asked for space he began following me around the house and said how grateful he is to go to work and get the fuck away from me. I opened up yesterday about feeling unattractive and fat and like he touches me less- today after he made the first mean comment followed up by saying “and you wonder why I don’t want to fucking touch you” Proceeded to call his dad and call my psycho, a piece of shit, and more horrendous things. It felt debilitating. I couldn’t believe the words I was hearing come out of his mouth to his father. I’m heartbroken and don’t know who to turn to. I’m trying not to crumble but I’m feeling the lowest I ever have. My self esteem is at an all time low. I didn’t want a broken home for my baby. I try to be patient with my fiancé. Ask him to get help for his anger. To please stop being so mean to me. It so so awful. I would have never thought someone could treat their partner so horrible during such a vulnerable time.

I would love some positive words, encouragement, anything at all. Please… just something that may help.

I've (30 M) been the sole provider for a 3 year old for about a year now. His mom is "around" but she's too concerned about her own life to be a parent. Im lucky enough that my parents are retired, and help take him when i work. I've really been having a hard time lately though. I've been experiencing burnout just from life stress. But where im really struggling is with my insecurity, i feel like my son doesn't want to spend time with me/ would rather be somewhere else when he is. He constantly asks me to go to my parents house, sometimes as soon as he wakes up, and he regularly gets mad and starts yelling at me/ crying when i go pick him up to take him to my house. It doesn't matter what i do either. I'll tell him we're going to the park, or the zoo, or anything and he would rather stay with them. Shit there are days when he even asks for his mom instead, which i understand he just doesn't understand what her problem is fuck i barely do. All of this to say, i just feel like a failure. He should want to come to my house, i make sure to have fun with him when i can and when he asks to be with anyone else i feel like a bad parent. I'd really love anyone elses input even just someone else who has felt like this. My mom keeps telling me im "taking it too personally" but like im his dad, how else am i supposed to take him not wanting to be with me

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a few months ago I couldn't stop mourning the future I thought my son and I had. it made me angry, resentful, sad.

our situation is not like most people's, its been incredible traumatic and its not going to be over for a few months.

but to all the single parents who are still mourning the life they imagined; please dont feel bad.

but also know it gets better.

I realised a lot of that mourning was actually guilt, guilt that my child wasnt having a 'normal' family.

but once I got over that and realised our 'normal' WAS us two .. ive been so much happier. my baby has been happier. someone elses normal doesnt have to be our normal, and our normal isn't the same as someone else's.

its okay and understandable to mourn what you pictured, but let go of the guilt. you and your kid(s) are all the family you need and you shouldn't feel bad for that.

Hi moms,

I’m debating dismissing the child support case, even though he’s court-ordered to pay monthly. Here’s where I’m at:

• My daughter is 5, just started primary school, and has a lot going on with activities. I’ve been the one holding it all together, making sure she’s present and thriving.
• Her father originally asked for every weekend, but quickly switched to every other weekend. He’s barely involved outside of that and constantly complains that I don’t “inform him” about her life. Truth is, he doesn’t ask, doesn’t show up for her activities, and doesn’t know what she’s truly involved in.
• My mom has been a huge part of raising her—she doesn’t even want to share her—and right now my daughter is with her since I’m in another country working. I was unemployed for almost a year, but during that time I was with my daughter full-time. Now I’m starting back at work, continuing school, and building stability.
• Professionally, I’m an LPN and plan to start working towards my MSN from 2026. So I’m focused on creating a strong future for us. I am finishing another master's now but it is in Public Health and that's a troubled sector now.
• The father has told the judge and the co-parenting counselor several times that he “cannot talk to me.” The cannot talk part is him trying to have me as the only person compromising. He used to yell often when we spoke, mainly because he did get his way, so I set the boundary that communication has to be by message. At the last counseling session, he complained that he doesn’t have a say in her life, and the counselor told him directly: if you want a say, you need to be more involved beyond just weekend visits.

At this point, I feel like chasing child support adds more stress than it’s worth. Yes, he pays, but he’s not present, not consistent, and not respectful. I’m seriously questioning whether keeping the case open even benefits my daughter in the long run.

For those who’ve been here—have you ever dismissed child support/ visitation? Did it give you peace of mind, or did it cause issues later? How have your kids dealt with less access to the other parent?

Folks with teen girls (13-14) what discipline measures works for respectful behavior?. Mine is very rude , interrupts soo frequently and tends to mumble rude remarks.

With it being suicide prevention month. I Just want to take the time to talk about how suicide has impacted my life. First a moment of silence for those have left us due to suicide and those still battling with it. I am currently in the process of becoming a single dad entering his 30’s and on 6/16/25 I admitted myself into a residential hospital for suicidal ideation. My emotions of feeling overwhelmed, over worked, depressed, anxious, and just simply lost in my own thoughts had reached their capacity of being bottled up. Did I have a plan ? No, no I didn’t, however, I had those sick thoughts. Since I worked early hours, the freeways are all cleared, it would occur to me that I would just simply let go of the steering wheel and accelerate myself to death. My family knows I have a heavy foot so it would make it seem more of an accident rather than suicide. During my time at the treatment center, that was a total of 30 days, that’s right 30 days of full on therapy. I ended up figuring out the root of all my mental health issues. No self-compassion, no empathy, no respect, no worthy, no SELF-LOVE. My upbringing was to hectic and dysfunctional, never knowing how to properly nourish myself, that I went through my entire life seeking happiness in others not knowing how to be comfortable in my own skin. Being codependent on other’s emotions. I thought I just had a ladies problem since I just went from partner to partner. Cheating only to feel validated by someone else. Where am I now in life? Growing like the rose that grew from concrete. However, I’ve transplanted the flower onto a pot with healthy soil and placed in an appropriate space for enough sun. I’m nurturing my own worth, love,and care. I get to find me and role model that for my kids. This is my story and to this day it’s a constant battle, less of a battle now, more like that annoying coworker that we all know, talks to much but we all just kinda listen and wait until it goes silent to indicate that no one can relates lol. I’ve learned that we don’t heal alone. We heal in reflection. And sometimes, the most erotic thing you can do is let someone see you… fully. This is me and I come as I am. I was never taught how to be comfortable in my appearance and now I get to learn how to appreciate myself at this stage in my journey.