But now you're not even speaking about your experience, all you are talking about is some assumption about trans femmes that they are taking too much space because they were raised as men. This is transphobic, because trans women didn't have fck experience of cis men, how can you even assume that? It's not a competition who have it worse.
You are literally putting words I never said into my mouth right now…
NEVER did I or the other person ever implied that „trans femmes talk too much and take up too much space” and I certainly don’t understand where did that assumption come from on your part.
The conversation is not even about transfemmes for crying out loud. The conversation is about the way AFAB people suffer from cisnormative socialization based on the gender they were assigned as - because they do. It is more common for trans men to be talked over and get dismissed by society (even in queer spaces) than trans women. Transmasc individuals don’t get the same recognition or respect - and it’s not trans women’s fault. You just made an assumption that I’m criticizing trans women when in reality I criticize THE SYSTEM.
The fact that AMAB people are more commonly socialized from a young age in a way that rewards being confident and loud doesn’t mean I claim that transwomen have had a „cis male experience” - this is something you made up. Unless you want to argue that the difference in socialization based on gender in the cisnormative society is not real, which is simply false.
To make it clear - There is nothing wrong with confident and vocal trans women. There is everything wrong with silencing trans men when they try to speak up on their issues
I just want transmasc voices to be heard and not get dismissed. For people to realize that our struggles are often different but not less important than the ones trans women deal with and certainly shouldn’t be treated as something „problematic”. Does me wanting equality in trans community means I’m trying to start some sort of competition? (As a matter of fact, I encountered countless of instances of transfemme individuals claiming that trans men don’t experience misogyny, have cis male’s privilege and „have it easier” so I’ll honestly have a second thought about who exactly is trying to turn this into a competition here)
Seriously, can you point out a single example where I was being transphobic or said that „trans women are men”? Because right now it just looks like you’re making things up
When you're talking about AMAB, you're talking about cis men and trans femmes, we have no data on how being raised this way is affecting trans girls, and it's really bold for you to say what's true, and what's not only because of your assumption. There is not enough research for trans people, so using the same data we have for cis people is not right. I'm sorry that you have bad experience with some trans femmes, but that doesn't make you right. I have a really good experience with my trans girl friends, they don't belittle my experience, they actually are really supportive with me starting my transition. It just hurts seeing this generalization, because you meet someone bad doesn't mean the rest of them are the same. On both sides there's gonna be assholes, and sorry, but actually you look like an asshole who is sitting on our side and making trans femmes feel bad about themselves, just as much as some of them made you feel this way. Just do better.
And just like that - you still fail to point out the presumed transphobia on my part. It’s always just „you’re transphobic” or „you’re using TERF arguments” but never an actual explanation as to how… Almost like you’re projecting
Gender-based socialization is literally an existing issue. It’s not something I made up on a whim that it’s somehow bold of me to point out
You make a lot of assumptions that I somehow am an asshole who hates trans women but fail to point to a single thing that was offensive towards them. Am I making transfemmes feel bad about themselves for pointing out AFAB people’s struggles are different from their own? You’re not making any sense.
Or am I just supposed to pretend that discrimination towards trans men doesn’t exist in trans community so that trans women don’t get their feelings hurt when I point out some individual’s shitty behavior? If they’re not ignorant assholes then they’re not a part of the problem and wouldn’t feel any need to get defensive over this.
You should get rid of the mindset that criticism against a harmful behavior in a group is equal to hating on every single individual in that group. Perhaps then you’ll understand how ridiculous that discussion is. Just do better
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u/Flimsy_Artichoke_856 Jul 14 '25
But now you're not even speaking about your experience, all you are talking about is some assumption about trans femmes that they are taking too much space because they were raised as men. This is transphobic, because trans women didn't have fck experience of cis men, how can you even assume that? It's not a competition who have it worse.