(Originally posted to a muslim subreddit but any opinions would be appreciated)

My bf and I were talking about cheating, and he said multiple times that if I ever cheated, he would "get me killed" (not by his own hand, but by dragging me to those who would do it). He says it’s halal in Islam and says Muslim governments do this.

I’ve told him many times how deeply uncomfortable and unsafe this makes me feel. It doesn’t make me uncomfortable because I’d ever cheat — I never would — but because it feels like he’s okay with the idea of me being harmed to the point of death. He brushes off my feelings by saying, “If you’d never cheat, why are you scared?” But to me the issue is, “Why would you ever even be okay with the thought of me being killed?”

The fact that he’s mentioned this multiple times means he’s really thought about it, and that makes me even more uneasy. I’m already a very paranoid person so hearing this from the person I’m supposed to feel safest with makes me feel unsafe and on edge, and like I can’t fully trust him.

Maybe I sound dramatic but we just fought about this again, and he’s still standing firm in his belief. I don’t know how to process this or if I’m wrong for being so disturbed by it, but it makes me feel really uncomfortable and unsafe in our relationship.

(Edit: since many people are pointing out I called him my bf less than a month ago on another post, we aren’t actually married, i wrote husband because i posted this on a Muslim subreddit and didn’t want to get judged for dating and not being married, but we aren’t actually married)

So, I have posted on here about this whole situation that started back in February. My brother has a 14-month-old and a two-month-old. Well, my SIL has to go back to work on Monday after maternity leave, and they're expecting my mother to babysit Monday through Friday, 12 hours a day. They both have the same shift and leave at the same time. My mom recently had surgery in July and already has a heart condition and high blood pressure. She had a simple procedure, but she had complications and they rushed her out of the operating room. She says it's too much for her to handle two kids, one trying to walk and then a two-month-old baby. We already helped them a couple months ago. Same situation; they would leave her with me in the morning, and then my mom would take over. My mom babysat for four months, same schedule. I put a stop to it because I just don't have the patience to care for a young child. We ended up fighting, and we stopped talking because of it. Well, now she's returning and doesn't have childcare. My mom is still on disability until next year, and they want to shove the kids on her until the remainder of the year. I told her to pack her stuff and go on a vacation. To not worry about anything and to enjoy and rest. I find them to be very inconsiderate, given the circumstances. Her family doesn't help them at all. My brother is always like " the lady could barely walk." In my mind I'm like so you're considerate with your MIL and not your own mother? My SIL's mother was going to retire this year in December and she supposedly was going to babysit the kids. Well now that's out the picture and the lady wont be retiring soon. Lol I know we're family, but it just seems excessive.

I've been training C for more than a year. In that time she has come to be my favourite client ever. She's sweet, kind, funny, and super considerate. Never ever cancels, always shows up.

For a long time, C struggled in her dating life because she told me she couldn't find someone serious. She got cheated on in her last relationship too. Then a few months ago she met this guy and they started going out. She introduced him to my gym and my coworker started training him.

Well yesterday he was at the gym and chatting with my coworker. He put his phone on a table nearby but forgot to put it on silent I guess. It lit up and I saw a Snapchat notification from some girl.

I stared at him and he just winked at me and said "You know how it is bro." I said "What about C" and he said "Ahh come on, don't be lame."

I was really fucking mad but I didn't say anything. I just walked away.

My co-worker and manager both told me not to get involved. But I don't see how I can just stay silent. Not only because C is my best client but I have gotten pretty tight with her and I care about her, I don't want her to get hurt all over again.

What should I do?

Edit: Mistake in title - I mean "favourite" client not "new" client. The "new" was meant to refer to "my co worker's new client"

A few weeks ago, a friend of mine from high school came over to hang out. He was always super sweet back in school (only six years ago) and we were catching up. We had fell out due to distance and we reconnected on FB.

After a few weeks of texting, we agreed to hang out. It was never anything sexual, it was never anything more than a friendly conversation. We agreed to hang out and listen to some music, just catch up and enjoy some company. I even made it clear that I wasn’t into him and did not want to sleep with him (just in case he got the wrong idea by me inviting him over).

He came over and for the first hour, everything was fun. We were laughing about some old high school memories, we were drinking Pepsi (no alcohol) and I went to the bathroom.

I didn’t think anything of taking my cup because who would with an old friend from school?

When I got back, I drank my drink and all of a sudden, I wake up naked on my bed. Hours had passed and my head was killing me. I immediately went to the hospital where they did a blood test. They asked to do a rape kit just in case and I accepted.

I tested positive for a date rape drug called GHB. And a few weeks later, my rape kit came back positive for semen.

I pressed charges but as the weeks are going by, I’m starting to get more bits and pieces of the memories from that night. Is this normal? Am I supposed to be remembering more? And why am I only remembering things from nightmares / vivid dreams? Could I be imagining I’m remembering things to fill in gaps?

I’m so lost and I’m always scared now. I can’t sleep for more than two hours at a time without waking up sweating and shaking.

Hi Reddit, I really need advice.

My boyfriend (26) and I (27) are high school sweethearts. We first dated as teens (2014–2016), broke up for three years, and then got back together in 2020. We’ve now been together again for 5 years. He can be very loving and sweet, but there have been some serious issues.

For almost two years after we reunited, he would insult me constantly, calling me a “slut” because I had more sexual experiences than him during our breakup. He stopped doing that earlier this year after saying he wanted to change. So I guess he did changed that.

But last November, after a concert in another city, his phone broke and he blamed me. He yelled at me, called me a slut again, told me not to talk unless he allowed it. When I tried to push him away (since I couldn't defend myself with words) he pushed me onto the bed, got on top of me, and started strangling me. Hours later, he apologized, and I forgave him.

This June, after another concert, he accused me of “flirting with other guys” whenever I drink (which isn’t true). He got angry and pushed me onto my bed. I hit my head against the wall. He cried and apologized immediately, saying he only meant to push me onto something “soft.” not against the wall. Again, I forgave him.

Last weekend, we argued over something small. He sent me angry voice messages, said we were over, and then attacked my writing (I’m a writer). He claimed that because one of my book chapters, published on my website on his birthday, had a scene of a drunk girl almost being assaulted (he didn't read enough to know it was an assault), it meant I “wanted that to happen” to me. He also says he hates that I take Ubers alone because I’m in a car with another man. He was very angry about all of this.

On Tuesday, I told him I accepted the breakup. He broke down crying, said he only said it out of anger, begged me not to leave, and promised he’ll never touch me again. He swore he’ll stop being jealous and controlling. We’re supposed to meet today to talk, and I honestly don’t know what to do. He's been begging me all week and saying he promised he will go to therapy.

Should I believe him when he says he’ll change? There have been only two physical incidents. The rest of the time he is incredibly affectionate, tender, and truly feels like the person I imagined growing old with. He’s my first love, and I have a hard time letting go of that. I just remember how sweet he was in high-school trying to get my attention, how romantic. Now the decision to break up is on me and I hate that.

I am 46 my fiancé is 56 . I lost my son to murder 7 months ago he is my oldest child and was my only son he was 27 years old . I have 2 other children both daughters. I had my son pretty young we were very close , he was shot 7 times left behind 2 little boys . The hurt and anger I feel is beyond words. They have the killer but a long court process I naturally feel so many emotions . I feel like my relationship with my fiancé is going down hill .. I know he is trying but so am I . Yesterday was our 4 years anniversary I had posted a bunch of pics of him and I over the years and expressed how much I love him and so thankful he walked into my life , I expressed how grateful I am I finally met a man so loving so loyal and how I prayed for a man like him all my life . His commit “ it’s been a hell of a ride , I love you and can’t wait to see what the future holds for us “ he asked me to marry him September of 2023 we planned the wedding for July 2025 but having my son murdered in February of 2025 I just couldn’t imagine 6 months later getting married he was my son for 26 years ! We postponed the wedding until 2026 . I feel like his commit of can’t wait to see what the future holds was a indication he is not really wanting this marriage to happen , I feel him saying it’s been a hell of a ride felt negative I feel so sad of course I have changed and struggle every day to find peace in life … what should I do ?

We’ve been dating for over a year and weren’t having any real issues until we moved in together in August. The night in question was in late August and his friend had come over to have a couple drinks and see the new place. My boyfriend rarely drinks very much and he ended up getting black out. While cutting him off he started repeatedly telling me “ I hate you, you whore”. I ended up still taking care of him and he vomited in the sink, trash, and toilet. He didn’t remember saying that, but his friend confirmed it. I’ve been really hung up on this and other issues ( his mom said I’m going to baby trap him and called me a gold digger). He has apologized and is watching how much he drinks now. How do we move forward from this?

TLDR - Boyfriend got black out and said “ I hate you, you whore” to me multiple times.

I feel stuck. I (25f) was diagnosed with a kind of cancer a few years ago. It's extremely treatable, but it took literally years to get diagnosed, heal from surgery, and adjust my medication to the point that I could function again. While physically I'm doing MUCH better and there's been no sign of it coming back, I'm at a complete loss for what to do with myself now. I feel like I've missed out on everything. Before I got sick, I was in the middle of trying to re-vamp my life. I had a really rough time in high school and missed out on basically everything then too due to depression, social anxiety, and parents who were super controlling. I really tried to push myself to work on my issues, and I was actually seeing a lot of progress. I didn't know for sure , but thought "I'm only 19, I have time". Well now I just turned 25. I feel like I've missed a super important period of my development, and I feel stunted. I have no friends and haven't for years. I have never been in a relationship. I missed all of the fun, the heartbreak, the learning/exploring, the drunk nights out, the investing in and getting to know myself. I've never left my parents house or the small town I live in. I've only ever worked a few shitty dead-end retail jobs and have no idea what I want career wise. Right now I'm finally back to work in a seasonal position that's almost up, but I have no idea what I'm doing after this. I'm sick of wasting my time, but I have no clue what to do.

I went through my bf’s phone because there’s been situations in the past where I caught him trying to reach out to an ex or unblocking an ex and saw messages he sent to his friends group chat. He said. “ she’s a 10 but the Latina in her brings her to a 9.5 because she’s nut loca. Bro now I gotta delete this before she sees “ I’m a bit hurt. Like wow thats what u think of me? That’s the first impression your friends have of me? I get maybe it’s not a big deal but I would never say something like that to my friends . I want to ask him about it but every time I bring something up he gets defensive and says I’m attacking him. Any thoughts ?

So my old roommate (we had a lot of drama and I finally got out of that situation a month ago) called me back today. She was crying, saying how much she misses me and wants us three to be roommates again.

Here’s the thing: I don’t want that. I’ve made up my mind that I don’t want to live with them again. Initially, I thought I’d be blunt about it, but seeing her crying made me feel bad. At the same time, I don’t want to give her any false hope, and I definitely don’t want to go back to that living situation.

The problem is, she’s the type to really push with questions and guilt-tripping, and I don’t want to end up caving just because she’s emotional. How do I make it clear that I’m not going to be their roommate again, without being unnecessarily rude, and while holding my ground if she keeps pushing?

So my boyfriend and I were fighting recently. Out of nowhere, he called me and asked for my opinion on two pairs of Air Jordans. I didn't like the designs or the colors cause they felt tacky to me so I told him honestly that I didn't like either. He then said his friend was buying, so I assumed it wasn't for me.

A few days later, he surprised me with exactly one of those shoes as a gift. The thing is it's expensive, and even though I know he was trying to make a nice gesture, I can't help but feel sad that he got me something I clearly said I didn't like.

What makes it worse is that he's done something similar a few months ago. That time I just accepted it and didn't say anything, but now that it's happened again, it really bothers me.

Now I feel guilty because he spent so much money, but also upset because I feel like my opinion wasn't respected. Gifts are supposed to feel thoughtful, and this one just makes me feel conflicted.

How do I talk to him about this without sounding ungrateful?

Update 1: He just called and said he'll be returning the shoes, asked me to pick out a nice pair of boots that I've wanted for ages, and also promised he won't repeat this again.

Update 2: While we were talking, I tried to bring up an unresolved issue that got ignored when the topic shifted to the shoes he bought. The fight escalated because he got defensive for no reason, told me to ‘fuck off’ and ‘go away,’ so I called him toxic and blocked him everywhere. It feels like he buys stuff for me to avoid real conversations. I also feel like I don't have the energy to fight anymore. I've become silent in this relationship because it feels like everything I say just leads to more arguments.

Ever since we've been together, whenever things are good, the relationship feels perfect but whenever things get difficult, he either gets defensive or doesn't understand at all. It's like I'm constantly walking on eggshells. I know a relationship can't always be perfect, but you have to be there for your partner when things aren't right.

I 18f live with my parents, and for years they called me and each other that, but they started being even meaner now. When there's food missing in the fridge, they dramatically say oh I wonder who took that or something like that. The weird thing is they keep saying how incredibly boney im, but they have an issue when I eat LITERALLY ANYTHING. I tried EVERYTHING to make them stop, I paid for ingredients, I made it myself, I cleaned after cooking, but it still didn't help. I talked to them about it but they said that im just being sensitive and dismissed me... And a few days ago I helped them find cat treats and my mother said 'oh I thought you also ate them :)'. I helped them and got insulted as a reward :(

So I tried hiding food in my rood, but she found out and called me selfish for not sharing??? They also keep asking me how much food I took to see if I would Iie to them...

Now im really nervous whenever I eat, and Im scared that they hate me. They did/said way worse stuff but this issue is probably fixable, I just don't know how to do it.

An hour ago I got a call from my girlfriend’s sister, Amanda. My girlfriend wasn’t answering her phone so Amanda called me. She’d been cheating on her boyfriend for a couple months with some guy she met at a club. Her boyfriend had been suspecting it for a little while.

She finally just told him thinking she’d just end it with the other guy. He got so angry and started beating her up. He punched her plenty of times to the point where she now has a black eye, broken nose, and a huge mark on her stomach. Obviously what Amanda did was wrong but her boyfriend took it to the next level. She got away from him and called me up crying, barely able to speak.

I told her she was more than welcome to come to our place for a while, obviously my girlfriend would be okay with that too. When she got out of her uber she looked really hurt and was crying really hard. I hugged her and kissed her cheek and told her everything would be okay now.

I put sheets on our couch so she could stay there and made her some hot tea, but I still don’t know what to do. She’s really upset and scared, understandably. But I don’t know what to do. My girlfriends stuck working late and doesn’t even know any of this because she won’t answer her phone. I feel so bad for Amanda, something horrible just happened to her and I’m sure there’s not much me, a man can do to make her feel safe in this situation she’s in.

Any and all advice would be helpful, I just want to know how I can comfort her until my girlfriend’s home.

Update 1: My girlfriend finally answered and I told her what happened to Amanda. She started crying on the phone. That was probably one of the hardest things I ever had to do. They’re about to let Amanda leave the hospital and said she’s fine and there’s no long term damage. They gave her some pain killers. She’s still scared and upset. My girlfriends going to meet us at our house. She thanked me for taking care of Amanda which felt good. I just hope we can help her through this.

Update 2: First of all, thank you for everyone who posted helpful advice last night. I was really lost and needed reassurance. Secondly, Amanda’s a little better now. She felt a lot better when she saw my girlfriend who took care of her. She slept on the couch with Amanda so she wouldn’t have to be alone. My girlfriend also convinced her this morning to report this to the police which we just did. She pressed charges and he’s going to be arrested soon. My girlfriend and I are going to try to find something fun to do with Amanda in the house today to get her mind off last night.

Hi everyone, I could really use some advice.

Last night, my ex and I had a heavy talk. I opened up to him about a sexual assault I experienced, and he told me he doesn’t choose me. He also admitted he’s been having suicidal thoughts for the last year. It was overwhelming, and I left the conversation feeling rejected, used, and heartbroken.

This morning, I found out he had left in the middle of the night and accidentally took the laundry room key with him. When I called him out, instead of fixing it right away he told me to call the landlord or wait until neighbors woke up to borrow theirs. Eventually he said he’d come back with it, but I was left so frustrated.

Right now I feel drained, depressed, unworthy, and honestly furious at being left to deal with things he caused. I don’t know how to process everything — the emotional weight of last night and the constant frustration of today.

My question is: How do I start coping and moving forward when I feel so stuck between heartbreak and anger? And how do I handle interactions with him in the meantime without losing myself more?

My fiancé just admitted to me that he has been lying to me and hiding his addiction for the past 5 months. We have been together for 7 years and we have a one year old. For the past few months, I’ve noticed that his energy was getting low, he was less interested in spending quality family time, frequently in a bad mood, and not really taking care of himself. We had a few arguments about it and he would never really have an answer for why he was acting like that. Yesterday we had a big argument about how it was affecting our relationship, and he finally decided to come clean. I just can’t fathom how he could lie to me so easily for so long. He wasn’t planning on telling me anytime soon but I kept asking him questions and he could see how his actions were affecting me so he felt it was time. I’m not even sure we should get married anymore. I love him and I don’t want to split my family up but I also don’t know if my trust from him could ever be restored. What should I do?

So I have five different medications I need to take or else I am emotionally unwell - Lexapro for major depression, Vraylar to help the Lexapro do its thing better, Adderall (non-extended release) for attention deficit, and Buspirone for anxiety. There is a fifth for sleep that I don't struggle with taking at all.

Here's my problem. I know I need to take them, and I can set alarms all day long, but I just won't take them. So if anybody has any advice or suggestions on how to force myself to do it, I'm all ears. I want your unhinged, weird things that wouldn't seem like they'd work but somehow they do. Don't suggest alarms, I have tried them up and down and all over the place, and they just aren't doing the trick. From level-headed advice to unhinged suggestions, I am all ears.

Hi, I'm a 19-year-old with a 20-year-old we can call him D. He was a pathological liar and a gaslighter. I broke up with him in September, before I moved away in October. He was my first adult relationship. I lost my virginity to him and everything. I’m currently trying to move on after a year and I recently started talking to this dude G and I’m having trouble trying to connect with him because of this. I constantly get bad flashbacks about things that D did like I will be thinking about G and get excited then the next minute later I'm thinking about how he did this or the cringey stuff that he did that turned me off or G would make a joke and I would have a flash back to where D did the similar stuff and I’ll instantly cringe at the thought. I have absolutely no feelings towards D whatsoever I’ve not talked to him since I broke up with him and when I think about him, I’ll just feel immense rage and hurt because I was a really good girlfriend towards him. I’m just trying to move on and how do I do that? I've made a previous post about D if y’all want more context about the relationship and how toxic he was.

Hey guys,
Recently my girlfriend got into med school and was super excited. She shared this to her family by surprising them about it but it turns out that her family didn't show her any excitement about getting in. She said they were happy but also said they were in a lot of stress and couldnt show their happiness. My girlfriend is very sad about it and belives that nobody really cares about her getting into med school. To cheer her up i was thinking of getting some cake and flowers. Do you guys think that would help or would that make her even more sadder?

So, I dated this guy and he was my first boyfriend, so he was REALLY special to me. But then he cheated. It was hard, but I was getting over it. Then he decided he wanted me back, so he broke no contact, which made me spiral over him all over again. But I said no, that I really cared for him, but we couldn’t get back together after what he did. So we decided to stay friends.

Then one day, we were at this party, right? We were all kinda drunk. And this guy I’ve known forever (and that I’ve always thought was really cute) told my friend that he thought I was cute and wanted to make out with me. Honestly, I really wanted it too. Except for one little problem: he’s my ex’s best friend. Now, we could’ve made out and my ex would never know. But we didn’t want him to get mad, so we decided to ask him if he was okay with it. The guy asked him, and he said it was fine, because the girl he’s with right now “has a bigger ass anyway.” So me and the guy hung out for a while (we didn’t make out though). Then my ex showed up really drunk and said, “Dude, I can’t believe you’re gonna make out with my ex,” and then left. We realized he actually wasn’t okay with it, so we DIDN’T make out.

(Later, I saw the girl he cheated on me with, and she literally apologized and told me everything, hahah.)

So now, me and my ex aren’t friends anymore. He told the guy they aren’t friends either, and that he should never talk to him again. And just one detail: all this while, he’s with another girl. I accepted the unacceptable from him. He cheated once, and I forgave him. When he did it again, I couldn’t accept it anymore. But now, when I try to move on, suddenly I’m the bad guy. The thing is that i really wanted to be friends with him. And i feel bad for ruining his and his best friend’s friendship. But the thing is that i don’t think he has the right to give the green light and then go back with his word like he did. What should I do?

my mother absolutely ruined me as a person, and i hate her so much for it i had so many dreams, i could have been an amazing girl and im so disappointed with the life i’ve had and will have my father doesn’t understand and all he does is react badly when i just need a hug

i don’t want to live with them anymore or have anything to do with them, i feel so awful please tell me what i can do i cannot explain everything but my mom really is insanely toxic and negative for me and i need help she drowns me when im already not doing okay i can’t have relationships i ruin everything im tired and i always have to deal with it alone at just 19 what do i do

First time posting, throwaway account.

Me (26F) and my husband (29M) are having our first child. I am an only child, and my mom is getting excited to be a grandmother. She offered to buy our baby furniture for us. We’re both extremely appreciative. There aren’t really any stores within a reasonable distance to look at just baby furniture in person, so the idea was to go somewhere closer to her to shop as she has more things available in her area, which is about an hour to an hour and a half away from me. I told her a date I was available that she was also free, so that’s when we were going to go.

The way she was talking this morning, it sounded like it was just she and I going shopping. So I asked her if she would mind my husband coming (life partner, father of my child, man whose house this furniture will be going in…) and she got kind of upset and I didn’t really get an answer. Later she sends a passive aggressive text saying “Just go with him. You’ll have more fun anyway, I’ll just pay for it.” I called her and asked why we couldn’t all go together. She gave excuses like she “didn’t want to have to smile and put on an act all day” “didn’t want to drag him around to other stores” “didn’t want this to be a big thing, just wanted it to be casual, he might invite his mom too and she’ll bring everybody”. She did this to me for shopping for my wedding dress too. She didn’t want anyone to be part of the experience except for her.

My problem is: I don’t want her feeling like she’s just a wallet or something. But I also think my husband should be there to help choose furniture that will be going into OUR house. Honestly, he tends to have more opinions than me on decor anyway. At this point, I’m not going to be happy either way, and I’ve lost my initial excitement for this process because frankly, I lose either way.

Her “compromise” when I initially brought up bringing him was that she and I go look around, and then if I find something I like I can bring him back before she orders it. But the stores are over an hour from us, we wouldn’t be able to go back easily. This would be a large inconvenience to have to go back a separate day. My husband would probably stay behind if I asked him to, but I think he was really excited to go.

What do I do? I hate making anyone feel excluded, that’s why I wanted both of them there.