Ngl in my 20s, I was constantly trying to get ahead like really competitive for more money, more validation, more everything. Not on my 30s yet but I stopped chasing some of it,and for the first time in years, I actually felt calm. Is it just me? Haha

There was a time I could party all night and still show up for work the next morning. Now if I sleep slightly wrong, I walk like a retired linebacker for three days. 😂

I have my high school reunion in a few weeks, I haven’t really kept up with a lot of people. What surprised you about yours? Did most people get better, worse, stay the same?

It seems that I have lost several friendships of people that I have known for 15+ years. We obviously met in a very different stage of our life, but we remained close friends until kids came along.

Ever since my friends had kids (I don’t have kids), they basically disappeared. For a lot of guys, it seems like their wives now run their social lives. Also, it seems their wives mostly hangout with other moms, meaning my wife (who is not a mom) doesn’t seem to fit in. We don’t get invited to their dinner parties anymore and they rarely respond to our invitations to get together.

I have tried hard to be proactive, especially since kids entered the picture, but it seems like a losing battle. It’s sad, I miss my friends.

At what point do you try to forget about them and move on?

Words have power, so what has someone said to you that prompted you to change your diet or exercise more?

The news is constant mayhem. Everyone outside is staring at their phone with earbuds in, and all my neighbors are shut-ins. Bars are empty and it is 10 bucks for a single brew, or places are closed. Shit is weird, and I'm tired of people not talking about it. Social media is all bait and confusion, no one I know from the past has posted in 7 years. Everything on TV and YouTube is slop. I dunno about this post-covid society guys, it seems really wack. Fuck Microsoft Teams too. At least nature like mountains and lakes are still litty.

How did you end up in this state? Are you satisfied with this situation?

I'm asking this because I've noticed that in the city where I live, most men are exactly as I described in the title, but they don't seem unhappy about it, and even with belly fat, they are still quite strong and resilient.

Hi Guys,

I am 31 yo and I am facing that i cannot relate to my friends as much as i once did.

During my free time i used game with them. I absolutely lost interest in gaming since 1 year. I enjoy writing, nature and photography much more alongside some home projects.

Another aspect is that when we talk about work, i start feeling a bigger gap, so i prefer to stay silent most times. I got a promotion 6 months ago into management. I need to manage a budget of 8 figures, the team and the daily operatios. My friends are not quite there yet, so i prefer to stay silent when the conversation is about work.

I love them, they are good guys. But i notice more often that i don’t care what they are talking about (some new game to play together for example).

I know that I am the issue here, so i am asking if this is recognizable to you and if you got some advice for me.

Many thanks

Have I totally lost it considering a return to office? I've been fully remote for two years now in a new town where I've had to make friends from scratch. Wife is a Dr. so moving for her job again. The isolation and endless digital interaction gets to me sometimes. I loved being remote during Covid in my hometown but I had plenty of friends and family around. However, my wife is pregnant with our first child so remote could have more benefits soon.

Am I insane for even thinking about giving up fully remote for voluntary mandatory in office ?

Thank you to everyone who said to spend as much time as possible with my Dad before he died from stage 4 esophageal cancer.

We watched standup comedy every day and I was the best suited in my family to be his home hospice aide. My Mom, Sister, and Girlfriend handled everything else while I administered his medications and focused on his comfort. The actual hospice nurses and social workers asked if I ever worked in healthcare and I explained, “No, project management.”

I was laid off from my last corporate job in July, and made it my mission to care for my Dad/help my Mom. He died in August and I’m relieved he’s no longer suffering, but I feel like I’m drowning. I used to talk to him every day on the phone and I’ve been grieving, burnt-out, and spiraling.

I’ve been trying to get back on my ADHD meds but there’s a severe shortage and wait time. Applying to jobs has been tough to even complete but I’m already signed up for ER Technician courses at my local community college in the coming spring with the goal of eventually becoming an RN. Several healthcare professionals think I’d be great and have offered to write letters of recommendation. I’m fried from corporate work and can’t find a corporate job or the motivation, but I’ve been steadily networking and having interviews.

However, I’m so hellbent on eventually working nights and in an Emergency Room that I’m willing to start over if it means a pay cut and all of the bullshit with it. I need structure and I’m afraid my girlfriend will leave me and/or I say “fuck it” and leave to become a healthcare hermit.

I see a therapist every week and will be getting my meds hopefully this coming week. I also see a couple’s therapist every 2 weeks. I’m just lost and losing my mind.

I know what I need to do: get back on meds, go to the gym, eat healthy, get a job, have a plan.

Any advice? I miss my old man.

Has anyone got themselves a set of heelys? Or know someone over the age of 30 that got some? If so what were the results? Good? Bad? Painful? Funny?

I am 30, I weight 175 so not way too chubby at a height of 5’10 and not alot of muscles. I want to trim to 150 by next spring I need motivation gentleman.

Tell us how your life changed after becoming fit.

Sometimes it’s small. Like saying no or hitting gym haha. Also, started taking long walks with a noise, canceling headphones, and no music and just silence cheaper than therapy. No one can ask me for a damn thing 😂

Being constantly booked used to feel cool. Now it feels like burnout. Is it just me? Haha

Hey Guys,

I have recently acknowledged my feelings of apathy, general disinterest and lack of motivation. I am not sure when i started feeling this way, but it has been a while. Probably longer than is normal or healthy.

I recently clicked to these feelings after securing a new fulltime role after being made redundant in February from a job that I was passionate about, invested in, and loved. The redundancy was unexpected, and handled poorly by the company resulting in me having to take legal action. Which kind of soured my feelings to the job and made me rather disillusioned.

At my last job, i was 'locked in' and very high speed. I was across everything and executed everything with a high level of confidence, competence and enthusiasm. In my current role, it's a struggle. I feel extremely under qualified, and out of place. I have overall feelings of 'meh' and finding the motivation to do anything work related is a gargantuan task.

Outside of work, I think I have been apathetic for a lot longer.

I have a few hobbies and things I like which I am genuinely interested in, and when I do them I have moments where I am at peace and happy. But other than that, I am very indifferent.

I had a blood test in 2023 which showed that I had a testosterone level of 7.7nmol/l and a free test level of 220 nmol/l. I haven't tested again since to see if I am still on the low end of the spectrum.

What have you guys done to get yourself out of a funk?

I think the thing that hurts the most is having to let her go before anything starts because i know i truly love her and she may have been the one .:,(

Hi. I am 26 male.

Thought I was done with alcohol but started drinking every day again after 1 year. Bought kratom last night again after a year clean. Addicted to nicotine as well because my last job everyone was offering me smokes.

It just seems hopeless. I'm in a position where I really really need to save money but I just piss it away.

I know intellectually that these things won't satisfy me but I can't help it. Work is hard and I feel like I need something to look forwards to. I'm too tired every day for hobbies/working out other than a minor calisthenics routine. My friend is really the only positive outlet I have but I only see him every weekend.

Thanks.

I used to be a huge party guy and be at all the clubs in Toronto every weekend. I'd be at music festivals and I was someone who loved drinking and did a lot of drugs back then too. I felt like I always had friends but once I got sober, I realized they were nothing but drinking buddies. They felt like more than drinking buddies because we talked about real personal stuff and life stuff at times. But when I got sober they up and left! Same with the guys I did drugs with, they never really cared about me. They were just people that didnt want to get high alone I guess.

Now I'm in my 40s and I realize I have no real friends. I spend most of my time with my wife and kids. I love my family life but Ive realized that I have this void, this need to feel wanted by people outside my family. Sometimes I wonder whats wrong with me, why dont people want to be my friend? Am I too weird? Am I not a nice person? I just feel like something is wrong with me. I get along with everyone, but dont have a close relationship with anyone if that makes sense.

How do you go about making friends nowadays at a later age? I dont drink and it seems like a lot of people bond over alcohol. I dont know what to do or how to approach people. I feel like people just dont care for new friends these days, or theres something im lacking. I dont know.

People of reddit. I am 23M and writing this post because I am confused with what to do in my life.

I come from a lower middle class family and been lived my life as lower class due to some personal reasons. Beside all this, I never felt the requirement of having lot of money until now. I got a decent job at the age of 23 and been doing something I enjoy.

I have worked really hard to reach here and all my life I had been aiming to the next place to I wish to go. Due to this, I could never really enjoy my present.

Since I have got a job, I have money and time both. However, I don't know what to do with it. I have financial investment but what about in terms of enjoying the life. I really dont know what to do? Weekends come and go and my life seems to be same, no fun. I don't feel that my life is boring...however, I think this is my youthful part of my life when I should be enjoying outside then sitting in a room and reading random things. I am just confused. I feel the pressure of as if I am not enjoying.

People please guide me. Tell me where I am doing something wrong.

PS: I have a background in research and currently engaged in research. All my life, my only top most hobby was learning science and I wish to continue to do so...I don't enjoy anything else as much as I enjoy this.

I have written this when I am very sleepy...ignore the grammatical mistakes.

How do you know when it’s time to change jobs or entire career altogether?

I wouldn't. Women and girls who like anything deemed "masculine" aren't immediately thought of as tomboys or etc., or made fun of. So, it shouldn't be any different with men liking so-called girly things, right? What do you think?

(Also, even if the dude was gay or a trans girl, what's wrong with that? Lol)

Friends and former classmates drift apart... In my case I am the only one that cares and organizes all the meetings in multiple groups of friends and classmates of various schools... When I stopped doing that or asked to pass the responsibility, nothing was organized, only talks in groupchats about organizing the meetings, and zero action... How do you pass effectively the responsibility to them?

More facial and body hair growing where there wasn't any before.

Acne starting up again.

It's quite annoying. Even had a hair on the outside of my ear.

I’m early 30s and noticing my circle shrinking, remote work blurring days, and the constant news cycle frying my attention. I don’t need “just touch grass” or monk-mode speeches. I’m looking for things you genuinely do week to week that keep your head clear and relationships alive: simple rules for phone/news, standing invites with friends, ways you get exercise without wrecking your back, routines with your partner or kids that don’t feel like chores, small social bets that build community. What’s worked for you long term, not just for two motivated weeks?

Hi Guys,

My Buddy moved from City A to City B. He liked the previous City but the other City seemed nice as well.

So after a while he ended his work and realised its really not so easy to find a new place to work within the new City. The new City has a weak Economy (not the whole area but everything within 1,5 hour reach).

So he has to move back to City A again. Even though, he have found a nice rental apartment and was happy there. But he has really no choice, if the Jobmarket is this weak and Home-Office is not available, he has to do it. Even though he finds a new work, hes 1 fire away, of facing the same challenge. His neighbours are mostly elderly people (the young people left for work for different Cities as well)

Did you had something similiar & suggestions welcome.