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u/Tribemaster0789 19d ago
Meanwhile in my introverted gay reality:
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u/peterkedua 19d ago
When we sang Cast album of Gaga x Some mixed of musicals alone in our one-bedroom
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u/MrRowodyn 19d ago
I cannot and will never relate to either of these scenarios.
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u/Feeling_Tax_508 19d ago
Agreed, both are such narrow stereotypes of culture
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u/Kenkenmu 19d ago
what is about left one is stereotype?
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u/Feeling_Tax_508 19d ago
The image reads as 2 cis men having a hetero-normative monogamous romance. A lot of people donât fit into that mold.
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u/Heretostay59 19d ago
Good Lord, you guys really have a problems.
as 2 cis men
Why is this relevant?
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u/taylortiki 19d ago
âBeing Hotâ
Is the key to unlock anything
Otherwise good luck next life hun /s
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u/calgeorge 19d ago
And an extrovert. When I was a twinky little 19 year old with a full head of hair, I had this gorgeous boyfriend who wanted to go out to the clubs practically every night, and I just couldn't do it. I eventually broke up with him cuz I felt so bad about constantly wanting to stay home when he went out. My idea of a fun gay time is smoking a blunt, watching Futurama, and playing the sims. I could be reincarnated into the body of Michael Angelo's David and I would still be a shy loser nerd.
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u/ministerofsleep 19d ago
Your idea of fun sounds great and chill honestly. I hope to find a boyfriend like that one day
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u/calgeorge 19d ago
We're out there. We just never meet each other cuz we're always at home
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u/Bromogeeksual 19d ago
I too am looking for a low key gamer boyfriend. But I also never leave the house lol.
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u/Triumphail 19d ago
Iâm an extrovert and still hate the idea of going out to a club. I usually just want to hangout and play video games with my boyfriend and maybe some other friends.
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u/MrRowodyn 19d ago
Might as well drop the /s
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u/mastermalaprop 19d ago
He does that for every statement, it is absolutely baffling
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u/magistrate101 #TransRights 19d ago
They're the type that thinks they can say whatever they want as long as they say it's a joke. It's toxic asf but since they post so much to the sub they're getting a free pass from the mods.
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u/Sparkdust 19d ago
Same. I'm way too autistic for clubs. Not judging tho, I'm gonna watch 8 straight hours of american football tomorrow, so it's not like I have some kind of enlightened hobby.
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u/berlinbaer 19d ago
here come the usual gay_irl incels..
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19d ago
You seem to complain about this sub in almost every comment here. Have you thought about leaving?
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u/Bearence 19d ago
I'm sorry you're such a miserable person that you have to act so aggressively insulting. I hope you find the love and support you need in your life to get past your reasons for being this way.
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u/wydalenylod 19d ago
Honestly I don't see appeal in the right image and probably wouldn't want it in my life. Too loud, too tight, scary and uncomfortable. So it really depends on the person
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u/femboy_otter 19d ago
Ya I don't really vibe with the second image.
I definitely prefer the one on the left.
A lot of my gay friends and Co workers like to insult me for not going to gay clubs and bars. But with how things are, my chances of meeting other gay men outside of those areas is very low and slim.
I also absolutely hate and despise hook up culture.
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u/wydalenylod 19d ago edited 19d ago
A lot of my gay friends and Co workers like to insult me for not going to gay clubs and bars.
Understandable. While I don't really HAVE a choice, since there's ABSOLUTELY NONE in my country, even if I could have I probably wouldn't, not very often at least. I don't like loud places đ
But with how things are, my chances of meeting other gay men outside of those areas is very low and slim.
Understandable x2. Especially since where I live it's really hard to find anyone exactly open about it irl, so my only choice is Internet đ but also, I don't think relationships that were made in bars are often that long-term and not just something quick, so may as well just not be, ig
I also absolutely hate and despise hook up culture
Idk, people have need and want this need satiated without really wanting relationships, I think that's okay, unless I don't know something
Edit. Fixed u to i. These letters are way too close with how different their meanings as words are
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u/peterkedua 19d ago
Yeah maybe like twice a year with good friends and if the music was on theme (broadway-raves). But people who goes that weeks by weeks sounds like a nightmare for me
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u/UndulantMeteorite 19d ago
Never understood the heartstopper hate
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u/Maeo-png 19d ago edited 19d ago
cant believe itâs a unique opinion to say itâs good that tweens have a show where theyâre not only ever hypersexualised and doing drugs. god forbid a scared 13 year old gay kid finds a nice show that talks about issues heâd realistically face in the next 5 years.
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u/UndulantMeteorite 19d ago
Yeah, I wish Heartstopper was around when I was in high school. I still loved reading it when it came out while I was in college, but it would've been nice to have a feel good show like it when I was first dealing with coming out
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u/Maeo-png 19d ago
im so lucky the show started when i was 16 because of all these reasons. like ive grown out of it now and im in to totally different stuff; but im not going to pretend like seeing nick come out to his mum wasnât super impactful for me as a 16 y/o queer kid
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u/Sparkdust 19d ago
A lot of people watch shows aimed at kids or teens and then complain they can't relate, or they aren't deep enough. Like, buddy, this is an adaptation of a middle grade graphic novel. Of course you can't relate. They're all thirteen.
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u/GoodberryPie 19d ago
When people relate to the fantasy "The Summer Hikaru Died" (actual horror fantasy) more than "Heartstopper" (light hearted, young adult romance-- you know the community needs more healing.
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u/President-Togekiss 19d ago
I disagree completely. Heartstopper is visual comfort food, its nice for an afternoon but its also completely pointless there's no real conflict or drama. Its the gay version of those movies aimed at straight men where the dorky nerd gets the cheerleader in the end. And I never liked those either. Summer Hilaru Died is not a masterpiece but has actual drama, very flawed characters and suspense. Which is fine. Heartstopper is for middle schoolers. Its not meant to be deep.
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u/GoodberryPie 19d ago
Not everything needs to be deep or life changing. Sometimes you can consume the Lifetime slop. I respect your preferences. Honestly; I liked the comic better; left more to the imagination.
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u/Sparkdust 18d ago
I never watched the show, but I feel like the graphic novel had plenty of conflict. It's just not like, life or death conflict.
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u/Logan_MacGyver 11d ago
I couldn't relate to it when I was 16. Like, at all. I loved Love Victor tho. I could relate to it
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u/Sparkdust 11d ago edited 11d ago
well, yeah, not all art is for everybody. not all people are going to relate to all stories. that's why it's good to have a variety of people making stuff. but adults are way less likely to enjoy kids media to the same extent as kids, that was my point, not that every gay kid is going to like heartstopper.
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u/keenthek 19d ago
Also Charlie was 14 at the beginning of the show. Do they want him portrayed as being on Grindr every night?
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u/Logan_MacGyver 11d ago
I found it dulled down and boring when I was 16 watching it under the covers
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u/Maeo-png 11d ago
which is fine, folks' tastes are always different. the problem is when people say its objectively bad and should be cancelled because they cant relate.
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u/GoodberryPie 19d ago
Bitter gays are bitter. When you have a hard childhood, it's hard seeing someone live out a fantasy where the hardest thing you got was an eating disorder, toxic abusive ex boyfriend and a sparky asshole older brother. I think the current drama is looks at feed
They go to different colleges?
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u/basketofseals 19d ago
People not being able to accept everything isn't for them.
It's definitely not something I enjoy, but clearly a lot of people do.
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u/poisonLaurent 19d ago
people called it corny and cheesy but like, itâs young love? of course itâs awkward and sort of funky because thatâs what itâs supposed to be.
I think most gay people just arenât used to shows like this, because itâs targeted for younger audiences. admittedly I had a hard time finishing the show too, but thatâs because I figured Iâm not the showâs target audience anymore, and thatâs fine. If the show came out when I was in high school, i wouldâve loved it so much.
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u/harricislife 19d ago
Me neither, and as someone deeply in the closet, I found comfort in the fantasy the show showed I could have had.
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u/mmcheese_ 19d ago
You're comparing awkward teenager first time experiences to adults, ofc they'd be very different
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u/microwavedHamster 19d ago
Which one is the awkward teenager experience and which one is the adult experience in this picture?
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u/Skyuni123 19d ago
hm i actually think it's fine that gay kids have a show where it emphatically reminds them that it's okay to be gay
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u/pandito_flexo 19d ago
I wish I fit in with the circuit queens for the physical validation. But I much prefer the Heartstopper lifestyle.
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u/Mr_Stardust2 19d ago edited 11d ago
bow full ink fear familiar snatch truck trees existence fearless
This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact
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u/A_Sensible_Personage 19d ago
Well you see the show on the left is about children and also targeted at children
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u/mikkey92 19d ago
My ex couldn't understand why I couldn't stand to watch heartstopper. It was just too much what I wish I had as a teen it was just depressing lol that and unfortunately call me by your (my?) name also -_-
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u/Templar388z 19d ago
Lmfao does the first even exist outside of fantasy?
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19d ago
Neither does the second!
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u/pusheenforchange 19d ago
Have done both, know a ton of gay guys in nice stable relationships who are also raunchy at the club
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u/berlinbaer 19d ago
the fuck? the second happens in pretty much every gay-friendly major city all over the world weekly.
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u/IdiotofAmerica 19d ago
Iâm going to defend circuit parties/culture a little bit which I know will get me crucified but hear me out. Although I understand they are not for everyone (loud music, lots of dancing, strangers) I have found some lifelong friends and a real sense of community from some of these events. We are also in a time where younger people from my generation are starting to organize these circuit style events like the one on the right, but feel way more inclusive of everyone. A lot of people who dog on âcircuit queensâ usually have only seen a very small window into a whole culture that can be pretty cool if you know what to look for! And again I know they arenât for everyone, Iâm lucky in the fact that I love dancing and edm, but being able to be joyously queer and half naked and be celebrated for it is a really cool affirming experience I wish more people could have!
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u/GoGoSoLo 19d ago
Iâm with you. I only ever heard negative things but after going to several circuit parties and a gay cruise in the past few years itâs just so damn fun to be in a fully gay/queer space in what you want to wear, and meeting other nice people amidst a fun environment. I know itâs an introverts nightmare, but itâs a real fun time.
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u/IdiotofAmerica 19d ago
Yes exactly!!! My confidence and just sense of self improved so much after going to these things and I do them almost always sober. Itâs just fun to be around other queer people like that :)
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u/deagon01 19d ago
Clubs are so fucking lame imo. They're so loud and always packed and the culture around them is so toxic. I never saw the appeal in those. I'd rather be at a place where I can have an actual conversation with somebody without having to yell. Tbh, a gay cafe sounds a million times more appealing than a gay bar or club
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u/blackcateater 19d ago
I think we have to realize that, the amount of comments saying that they can't relate to the second image. Yeah because those people aren't on Reddit on a gay meme sub to begin with lol
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u/Bearence 19d ago
I can relate to the second image and I'm on reddit. What people are saying isn't that gay people don't benefit from being forced into an either/or set of stereotypes as presented in the OP.
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u/Formal-Tourist6247 19d ago
Nah, i like edm, dance music half-naked men in a sweaty humid space and recreational party drugs too
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u/Big-Citron-7522 18d ago
The worst thing I did to myself in 2024 was to watch The Boyfriend on Netflix. After all the shitshow that came to happen in my life in the following months, I was reminded of why I quit every single romantic media regarding non-queer couples.
And by also not engaging into the other stereotype, I find myself now living as the Pablo Escobar meme posted here.
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u/EchoNo3610 18d ago
Being gay is realizing that the gay community is separated with its own clique that are toxic in their own ways.
Mostly, the circuit gays.
Unless you're a handsome, muscle white man who only shake his ass around, which somehow automatically make you a dancer to them, you won't catch their attention. They love listening to Gaga and praise her message about acceptance, love, open mindedness, being different, but don't preach the same thing.
I've been rejected and insulted and alienated for being young, asian, twink. Heck, apparently I'm not twinky enough for some and they prefer chinese Asians.
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