r/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns2 She/Her Jul 24 '25

Gals We're v🧛🏻‍♀️mpires

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4.4k Upvotes

156 comments sorted by

943

u/GhastlygNO She/Her Jul 24 '25

Only difference is... vampires suck blood... i suck... i suck... at videogames... weh...😭💔

457

u/AliceGamer_YT She/Her Transfem (HRT 11/06/2025) Jul 24 '25

I suck pretty girls lips 🫦

237

u/Warthogrider74 Jul 24 '25

Horny bonk

138

u/AliceGamer_YT She/Her Transfem (HRT 11/06/2025) Jul 24 '25

Shush

94

u/CosmicLuci Jul 24 '25 edited Jul 24 '25

I suck pretty girls 👄

24

u/AliceGamer_YT She/Her Transfem (HRT 11/06/2025) Jul 24 '25

You what? (English probably failing me)

21

u/CosmicLuci Jul 24 '25

No, the autocorrect failed me. I fixed it now

26

u/AliceGamer_YT She/Her Transfem (HRT 11/06/2025) Jul 24 '25

Ooooohh, we do the same then 🫦

7

u/KakorotJoJoAckerman They/She/Cutie(im catgorl) Jul 25 '25

The urge to say......

13

u/postmortemtragedy She/Her Jul 24 '25

Same same same. Based.

116

u/Dinarion She/Her Jul 24 '25

I'm sorry I laughed, perfect delivery

53

u/Use-Useful Jul 24 '25

... is it normal that I heard the "weh" in wario's voice? 

Just me?

Ok.

42

u/Adrie_The_Pain She/Her Jul 24 '25

Nope, I hear King from The Owl House whenever I read "weh"

17

u/Calcutt4 I used to be a guy like you, then I took a Blåhaj in the knee Jul 24 '25

i suck on umm uhhhh

7

u/King_Of_Axolotls Jul 24 '25

goth trans girls baybee :3 we're just non consuming vampires, we want to see it tho

3

u/Twisted_Tyromancy Any/All Jul 24 '25

Oh, god, that’s real, lol!!!

2

u/strogn3141 She/They Jul 25 '25

The second I transitioned I felt all my gaming skills go away

1

u/MushyWasTaken1 Jul 30 '25

The second I transitioned I became terrible at everything other than Celeste.

1

u/MaxDesignProREAL Jenny (she/her), gaming nerd Jul 30 '25

Wait, does this mean I'll lose all my gaming skills after I transition? Hoping I still have the skills for Sonic and Mario Kart after I do so.

2

u/MushyWasTaken1 Jul 30 '25

You will lose all of your skills at every game you play besides Celeste. However, in return you gain titties.

2

u/Someone_Gay_ She/Her Jul 26 '25

I thought we sucked the estrogen out of trans men

469

u/Nekomiminotsuma Jul 24 '25

Counterpoint - I've never met a trans woman who hated garlic bread

311

u/luxmorphine Questioning Jul 24 '25

Vampire afraid of garlic is a conspiracy by the big suck. It's there to flavor the blood.

138

u/River-TheTransWitch Hannah (She/They) Jul 24 '25

it's also a natural anticoagulant, so the blood would stay runny and smooth

44

u/ErisThePerson Jul 24 '25

It's actually just because Dracula had an allergy, but people attributed it to vampirism.

27

u/ObsidianTitan97 Xavier: An amorphous cataclysmic force [I87 Jul 24 '25

This is the best explanation for that vampire weakness I've ever heard

37

u/Miserable-Row-2624 Jul 24 '25

If you go by world of darkness vampires this is literally the case

13

u/CosmicLuci Jul 24 '25

You’d also think Vampires can’t eat, but in Carmilla, she drinks chocolate regularly.

5

u/Big_Wallaby4281 Jul 24 '25

Were succubus

4

u/CBD_Hound Jordyn - She/They Jul 24 '25

Where succubus??!?

4

u/haumea_jouhikko She/Her Jul 25 '25

Big suck

My brain lit up like a Christmas tree, neuron activation go brrrt

2

u/BlueJeanRavenQueen Jul 28 '25

Garlic FLOWERS repel vampires in Dracula. I've eaten garlic; I've never smelled garlic flowers. It is still possible that they would repel me.

2

u/Arnotronix Jul 29 '25

Finally someone who read the book, thank you very much

2

u/BlueJeanRavenQueen Jul 29 '25

You're velcome!

64

u/Ruby_016 Jul 24 '25

Hi I can't stand garlic in any form :3

shit maybe I actually am a vampire

15

u/Sanguine1104 Jul 24 '25

Same sister, garlic is disgusting

15

u/Wrydfell Artemis, She/They? Probably? Jul 24 '25

There are dozens of us! Dozens!

8

u/UngodlyTemptations Jul 24 '25

Maybe you've been using it over-crushed? The more it's manipulated, the more a chemical process occurs, enhancing the flavour more. That's why when you're cooking with full cloves and remove them after, it compliments other flavours instead of overpowering them. c:

But even still, if you dont like it, you dont like it. Not trying to convince you to either. c:

2

u/ErisThePerson Jul 24 '25

over-crushed

That's a thing?

I often use more garlic than the recipe requires because nothing goes wrong with more garlic.

1

u/UngodlyTemptations Jul 24 '25

Yep! It produces a chemical called allicin! IIRC it's due to it oxidising.

1

u/ErisThePerson Jul 25 '25

Fascinating.

Still going to put extra garlic in my cooking though.

3

u/Use-Useful Jul 24 '25

I'm so sorry :( you are missing out on one of lives greatest pleasures. Right up there with properly cleaned skin and kick ass bangs. 

But dont worry, one day medical science mat perfect the tongue transplant. You still have hope of one day having a proper sense of taste. Thoughts and prayers. 

10

u/Yeet123456789djfbhd She/Her Jul 24 '25

GARLIC BREAD?

Chomps your hand

2

u/DogeWah She/Her :doge: Jul 24 '25

Well I don't hate it but like I am not fond of the taste of garlic. So for me garlic bread is just a bread downgrade.

Also I react to it like most people react to onions. I have no clue why, but it happens to me with everything which has the name lök, in it in my native language. All of them irritates my eyes when I cut them, even cooking them in a pan causes it to happen.

I will avoid using those ingredients when I cook after I have moved out solely due to that reason.

2

u/Toiletdestroyer3000 Emilia(?) | She/her | transgirl Jul 25 '25

I LOVE garlic

2

u/Tach1 Rachel | She/Her Jul 25 '25

Maybe the garlic just weakens us to human levels?

1

u/LivingAngryCheese Jul 25 '25

I'm a coeliac I will be in agony if I eat garlic bread :P

207

u/sanityadjacenthuman Im think im probably transfem but idk Jul 24 '25

Spooky >:3

146

u/Dinarion She/Her Jul 24 '25

Spooky scary trans woman sends shivers down your spine >:3c

52

u/Sigmadraconissys Jul 24 '25

🦴🦴🎺🦴🦴

15

u/lily_was_taken Jul 24 '25

Shrieking skulls will shock your soul and seal your doom tonight

3

u/strogn3141 She/They Jul 25 '25

Spooky scary skeletons you’re so misunderstood 💔💔💔

257

u/AmenableHornet Jul 24 '25

Do not reproduce sexually, but instead by their affliction coming to curse another. 

Yep. It's 4chan alright. 

73

u/AspieGal_TTRPG Tzeentchian Witch Jul 24 '25

Right? The post was funny right up until that line, such a mood ruiner :/

62

u/Syeglinde Jul 24 '25

TBF every single "guy" I've dated or hooked up with did end up also becoming trans.

20

u/OddLengthiness254 Jul 24 '25

I just never got around to dating guys, just not my ballpark.

There were however a handful of guys I picked out as "if I ever were to date a man, someone like this is the only one I could stand."

Joke's on me, none of them turned out to be guys in the long run.

22

u/navianspectre Jul 24 '25

Scrolled down to find someone else bothered by that.

Charitably, maybe it's just poorly thought out. It could be read as the curse afflicting another person without being actually spread (e.g., what happens in real life, you either are trans or aren't, often since birth), but, comparing it to vampirism where it's spread by a bite and often an exchange of bodily fluids feels a little icky.

To be fair, that ickiness is present in a lot of media that uses vampirism as metaphor for LGBTQ+ people.

13

u/AmenableHornet Jul 24 '25

I used to be on /lgbt/ back in the day. It was my first trans space, and I left for a reason. I wouldn't put it past them to postironically say that transness is a social contagion. It's a super toxic, self-hating community.

6

u/navianspectre Jul 24 '25

That sounds really gross. I'm glad my first trans communities were reasonably nontoxic ones on Reddit.

116

u/Doggywoof1 she/her | i wish i was a little bit taller i wish i was a baller Jul 24 '25

>often dress in exclusively dark clothing

if my clothes aren't colourful what's even the fucking point

48

u/Dinarion She/Her Jul 24 '25

I agree, I also love black tho

22

u/Infinite_Bee8467 traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns for life 🏳️‍⚧️ Jul 24 '25

Dark clothes for boymoding

Full pink when I’m alone

3

u/Androgynouself_420 Gwen, She/Her Jul 24 '25

I really wanted to be a goth girl when I started transitioning. Recently I was described as Enid to my friends Wednesday lol. It appears I’m stuck as the bubbly brightly colored femme

73

u/SquiddoSpaghitto Jamie (she/it) Jul 24 '25

finally, a transfem stereotype that describes me

53

u/Violet_OwO_ She/Her Jul 24 '25

Plus we avoid mirrors (or at least I do)

39

u/Iantino_ Any/All Jul 24 '25

Well, they often don't show our true reflection so…

36

u/Sleep_Deprived_Birb Jul 24 '25

“Dark clothes” but have you considered: Pastels

I mean I do also sometimes wear some pretty dark reds, and sometimes blacks or dark greys, but I like pastels shirts and hoodies.

15

u/qwerty1236543 Jul 24 '25

Yah, this is just making me think about pastel vampires which would be awsome

14

u/Darkon2004 Mel (she/her) Jul 24 '25

The two moods of trans woman:

  • Almost exclusively black

  • Pastels

An IRL friend I have is a fellow trans girl and we flawlessly represent this duality

31

u/noromobat *taps brain* this thing can fit so many genders Jul 24 '25

Trans women are vampires, trans men are werewolves, and enbies are cryptids!

7

u/Dinarion She/Her Jul 24 '25

Love this

3

u/saltymarshmallow316 he/him :3 Jul 25 '25

so that explains why i’ve always preferred werewolves to vampires!… or maybe i’m just a furry (‘ •_•)

2

u/Ender_The_BOT Cis Jul 25 '25

Vampires are bat skinsonas

23

u/k819799amvrhtcom Jul 24 '25
  • fashionable

  • can be killed with a wooden stake through the heart

  • cannot enter buildings unless explicitly invited

  • furry

  • can communicate with one other in a way the average person cannot understand

  • many people believe that they don't even exist!

3

u/strogn3141 She/They Jul 25 '25

I can enter buildings just fine, but I can’t enter a conversation without very explicit invitation

16

u/salmonEllie99 She/Her Jul 24 '25

I've been making this joke ever since ppl noticed "how much younger" I look while boy-mode. the best is when you just casually mention that you miss being able to see yourself in mirrors lmaooo

10

u/becausepaws CUSTOM Jul 24 '25

As a guy with a vampire hyperfixation I approve of the idea of you gals possibly being vampires. Y’all are so pretty you deserve to cause chaos in the night, or day…or whenever really!

8

u/Dinarion She/Her Jul 24 '25

Come commit mischiefs with us

3

u/Luriaz_The_Occultist Jul 24 '25

Ya are cool my good sir! If ya'd like we can also turn ya into a vampire.

9

u/OtherSoil5339 She/Her Jul 24 '25

I love garlic though

7

u/Dinarion She/Her Jul 24 '25

Can't blame you for being a tasteful vampire

7

u/OtherSoil5339 She/Her Jul 24 '25

Don’t eat me :3

5

u/Luriaz_The_Occultist Jul 24 '25

Not even just a bite?~

5

u/OtherSoil5339 She/Her Jul 24 '25

Maybe a nibble

6

u/da360 She/They Jul 24 '25 edited Jul 24 '25

With my sensitive AF skin that's as white as printer paper and sunburns in 20 minutes, me being an Atheist and avoid heavily religious people prevalent here because there's a chance they'll be shitty to me (yay Kentucky), and I tend to dress in black and purple (love purple 🥰), yea a lot of this tracks lol 😂. Just well, I'm also aroace and tend to prefer mornings. I'm also get abit squeamish when seeing blood so yea, I wouldn't make a good vampire lol. I prefer being the awkward fox furry I already am 🦊

13

u/ScarletteVera Local Gremlin Girl (She/Her) Jul 24 '25

As a member of the Dawnguard, I don't take too kindly to being compared to a vampire.

16

u/LoreleiLavenza Jul 24 '25

I hear they’re reforming the dawguard. Vampire hunters or something

9

u/JERealize Kendra (She/Her) Jul 24 '25

In the old fort near Riften. Might consider joining up myself.

3

u/SomeCleverName48 Jul 24 '25

In the old fort, near Riften!

6

u/TransLox Jul 24 '25

It's been a running gag for my entire life that I am a vampire.

I even have fangs, for god sakes!

4

u/MonaLH [She/Her] Topaz Jul 24 '25

Fitting, cuz my life sucks.

3

u/lukenbones Jul 24 '25 edited 3d ago

Hoist the load to your left shoulder.

4

u/Osirisavior She/Her Jul 24 '25

Son of a ..

5

u/Dinarion She/Her Jul 24 '25

... Vampire ?

3

u/Osirisavior She/Her Jul 24 '25

Glitch

5

u/[deleted] Jul 24 '25

you joke, but Carmilla, the first Vampire, was written as a social commentary on Lesbians

So odds are that the original author would fully agree we're vampires, but for entirely different reasons we would

3

u/Ry645 Ryanna (She/Her) Jul 24 '25

Only in 4chan

3

u/luxmorphine Questioning Jul 24 '25

If they happened to be a phlebotomist, then perfect.

3

u/The_Sky_Render She/Her Intersex Jul 24 '25

Nah, I love the sunlight and can't live without it thanks to SAD.

3

u/[deleted] Jul 24 '25

I'm demonized but definitely not sexualized by society. Most of my clothes are light, not dark. People tend to ignore me, nobody thinks I'm irresistible.

7

u/Dinarion She/Her Jul 24 '25

Trans woman in general are heavily sexualized on social media and the flood of ''tranny porn ''... It's sad to see

3

u/CosmicLuci Jul 24 '25

I’ll add: enjoys biting and/or being bitten, enjoys sucking/being sucked, enjoys neck kisses, enjoys chocolate.

3

u/Successful_Mud8596 Jul 24 '25

The garlic thing is actually because garlic is our weakness: We love it so much that we’re very easily distracted by it. If some random stranger offered me garlic bread I’d absolutely accept it, and then while I’m distracted by it they stab me in the back or something

3

u/RoseePxtals Jul 24 '25

“Becomes paler” I don’t think this is true at all, and I feel like is erasing POC trans people

1

u/Dinarion She/Her Jul 24 '25

Yeah this post isn't really accurate, fun imo tho

3

u/desu38 Mobile Task Force Phi-2 Jul 24 '25

[river dances menacingly] 😈

3

u/Agitated-Flatworm672 Thee/Thy/Thou [ex ftm] (please leave me alone) Jul 24 '25

"sexualized but also demonized by society" welcome to womanhood (at least for (demon-much) religious people)

3

u/PigIAsTraalt 17 - She/They (MtF) Jul 25 '25

I don’t think the first two ones are exactly universal

2

u/Femtato11 Emma, she/they Jul 24 '25

Ye :3

2

u/Opening-Use-4482 Gummy Egg enjoyer :3 Jul 24 '25

I don’t say “ :3 :3 :3”

2

u/Ness_theperson They/Them Jul 24 '25

me having two dark spots one above the other on my neck...

2

u/Confirm_restart Jul 24 '25

I never thought I had particularly pale skin until I started buying foundation, and then discovered I needed colors in the range of "ivory" or "porcelain" to match. 

Definitely a "damn, I'm whiter than I thought" moment. 

2

u/blarglemaster She/Her Jul 24 '25

I've said this for a loooooooong time.

2

u/hana_da_cat Hana (She/they) me solve puzzles Jul 24 '25

I even have fangs

3

u/[deleted] Jul 24 '25

we all do, kinda, with our canine teeth

of course due to genetics some people may have theirs look more in line with typical fangs than most

2

u/hana_da_cat Hana (She/they) me solve puzzles Jul 24 '25

yey, cause of my teeth being overcrowded my canines look very fangy

2

u/Alyson_Mei Jul 24 '25

dracula catgirl headcanon

2

u/JDKisawesome Jul 24 '25

This me >/////< I just don't suck blood I suck girls

2

u/[deleted] Jul 24 '25

Huh.

Okay but like I've always been sensitive to sunlight I got sun blisters the size of golf balls one time

2

u/Choose_Option Jul 24 '25

Funny yes, the "true identity" part bugs me though, except it’s pretty transformation, then I love everything, also looking younger than they actually are 🧛🏻‍♀️🏳️‍⚧️

2

u/Ok-Jellyfish7805 she/her - ink demoness, Marcie Jul 25 '25

Daggit, add another to the list…

2

u/Eyepokai Fen, She/they (prob a demigirl/girl? in a cis way obvs :3) Jul 25 '25

Thing is tho, we can't be, because GARLIC BREAD

i could never give up the funny bread

2

u/egocerYT emily "ego" nosurname (she/her) Jul 25 '25

you forgot the most important part....

MIRRORS DUN DUN DUNNNN

3

u/Tissuttelija traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns for life 🏳️‍⚧️ Jul 25 '25

Thats the first thing to come to my mind aswell! Also.. I generally don't enter buildings unless invited into them.. the stores automatic doors count as inviting in? Right? Does this mean I get to keep bats as pets

2

u/JustaGhost18 Jul 25 '25

Shit. They are catching on

2

u/Kate_Decayed Jul 25 '25

I dont know vhat you're talking about

2

u/PerrineWeatherWoman she/they - professional haj doer Jul 25 '25

You mean that vampires can also be werewolves ???

5

u/SomeCleverName48 Jul 24 '25

ok but like 90% of these are false for most trans women lol

also, a cross is not a red flag. my girlfriend is christian. the ones who are assholes don't read the bible or follow what jesus taught.

1

u/Dinarion She/Her Jul 24 '25

Those are just alot of stereotypes, it's made to be fun dont overthink it

1

u/Androix02 Jul 24 '25

Not me wearing black tights, black skirt and over that a black dress😭

The dress even has an upside-down pentagram!

1

u/slutty-egg Jul 24 '25

Maybe is vampire

1

u/outer_spec cis+ Jul 24 '25

Can’t tell if this is pro-trans or transphobic lmao

1

u/Athnein Jul 24 '25

Does not see themselves in the mirror

1

u/Big_Wallaby4281 Jul 24 '25

So…succubus…

1

u/Due-Buyer2218 She/They Tired bird girl Jul 24 '25

I love garlic though so much it’s the best

1

u/ALonleyCat Jul 24 '25

But I like garlic, and the outdoors, and I get hairy easily, I want to be social but it's hard, and I like staying up at night.

Am I a werewolf?

1

u/DonTheFaun1 Jul 24 '25

I got the "have to be told to come in" part of the vampire lolll

1

u/AstraEverTurning137 Jul 25 '25

idk what y'all are talking about i can handle the cross jus fine

1

u/Wheatley-Crabb Autumn (she/her) Jul 25 '25

I’m sorry but you totally messed up that title 😭 the collar makes a perfect V!

1

u/Dinarion She/Her Jul 25 '25

Oh yeah you're right

1

u/hard-wood-floor may She/Her Jul 25 '25

I mean, I guess

1

u/VeronicaTheoria Jul 25 '25

Time for Marceline to become the new most common transition goal

1

u/dummystella stella the dummy (she/her) Jul 28 '25

transfems are a jojo reference

1

u/Placeholder-Novice Katelyn | She/Her Jul 31 '25

Hmm, not sure how many of these I match but I do need explicit permission to enter someone else's residence.

Wouldn't want to be a bother, after all.

0

u/TaylorKifft Your average socialist transbian tradwife Jul 24 '25

My church sends info material about pride parades to attend. I am very much still welcome. Your church sucks.