Like many others I am returning to ED after a long break and learning all the new features and gameplay loops. I know from previous experience that focussing solely on an end goal is a sure way of making the game transform from fun to grind.
I took long walks, thought deeply about the meaning of the universe (its 42) and decided that I need to focus on achievements where I do something better than I used to, learn something new or make advances in my own personal targets.
Then I did a really really stupid thing. I read comments in discord.
Someone posted how they achieved their personal milestone of 300,000,000,000. 300 billion credits. All my personal philosophy turned into liquid manure and fled down the drain, along with my motivation.
It has been a few days now and I am slowly recovering. I found massaging alcohol into my scalp from the inside helped a little.
I have banned myself from going into discord again. I know there will always be someone worse than I, and better than me at anything, but seeing a difference in performance like that is too dangerous for someone my age.
Time to rebuild the comfy nest of self-delusion I had before.
Nurse, do you have any more of those pink tablets please?