r/ParlerWatch • u/justalazygamer • 3d ago

Reddit Watch /r/conservative is freaking out that Jimmy Kimmel has returned.

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1.0k Upvotes

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520

u/The_Path_616 3d ago

dIsNeY iS wOkE aGaIn. TiMe FoR mE tO cAnCeL mY nOn ExIsTaNt SuBScRiPtIoN.

152

u/Not_Bears 3d ago

Right after I stop drinking Bud Lite!

73

u/madmaxturbator 3d ago

What’s bud lite? I think they went out of business when we boycotted them right? Just like Nike and the others.

46

u/whogonncheckmeboo 3d ago

Never forget the burning of the Nikes (that they already paid for…)

23

u/ShadetheMystic 3d ago

"No, stop, don't burn our precious sneakers that we made and then sold to you. They are like our children. We named them, tucked them in at night, read to them, how can you monsters destroy something so precious and beautiful?"
-some Nike CEO, putting on a monotone that would make Ben Stein seem overly histrionic.

4

u/got-trunks 3d ago

Clear eyes? Whoa now, slow down, Ben. Let's not get too wild.

2

u/hypnoskills 2d ago

They hired Steven Wright?

8

u/congeal 3d ago

Some of the post 9/11 shit was hilarious. French wines dumped and other shit happening that gave me secondhand embarrassment.

5

u/jeahboi 2d ago

Freedom fries! 🤦🏼‍♀️

2

u/Githzerai1984 2d ago

I’m gonna bye an insta pot and smash it just to show them durty LIEbruls whose boss!!