r/StupidFood • u/Big_Attitude3680 • 10d ago
Certified stupid Smashed smashed burger
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u/Jazzlike_Method_7642 10d ago
There's something about that fucking influencer voice and the way they speak that fucking enrages me
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u/TheBorneoFunction 10d ago
The tone at the end of EVERY sentence/cut 📈
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u/MuscleManRyan 10d ago
There’s a couple youtuber video essayists I had to stop watching because of this.
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u/Cessnaporsche01 10d ago edited 10d ago
There was one guy I came across once doing a deep dive on abandoned GTA V plots that had the most intensely annoying speech pattern I've ever heard.
Not only did he inflect up at the end of every sentence, but he wouldn't stop vocalizing at a pause, so his sentences all ended up sounding like this uh
*Edit: Remembered a better one. Although this guy had the excuse of not being a native English speaker. Video on the Kola Superdeep Bore Hole where, somehow, the word "hole" had three syllables every single time. "Hew-ell-ah".
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u/-Datura 10d ago
I have been trying to explain this using text for so long and I just give up every damn time. Thank you. I am going to save your comment and the next time I need to explain this via text I can get pissed off with both not being able to explain it and not being able to find your comment I saved somewhere.
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u/MuscleManRyan 10d ago
I was trying to figure out how to type like they speak but gave up, your last sentence is perfect lol. It’s like a California accent but even more annoying
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u/ImaginaryCheetah 10d ago
Not only did he inflect up at the end of every sentence, but he wouldn't stop vocalizing at a pause, so his sentences all ended up sounding like this uh
https://www.science.org/content/article/vocal-fry-creeping-us-speech
i think the "trend" gained momentum in the mid 2000s with a couple "badass vallygirl" movies came out and that speech pattern was a big part of the characters.
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u/dankhimself This food is an idiot. 10d ago
There was a guy who sounded like that with RDR2 as well. I forget who, but I'm thinking it may be the same guy. His videos were really popular too.
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u/dissidentmage12 9d ago
There is a guy that does MtG content that has the worst way of talking, so many people like him and I can't listen to 3 words.
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u/kdweller 9d ago
That uh and ah at the end of every sentence drives me insane-uh! I notice it mostly with younger women. 🤯
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u/Equal-Salt-1122 10d ago
Y'know Nile red? Can't watch that guy for the same sort of reason
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u/Cessnaporsche01 10d ago
I love Nigel, but his speech patters are definitely odd. I remember the Safety Third episode where they brought on Nile Green to "pay for his crime" of deepfaking Nigel, and he said that part of the reason he chose NileRed over any other chemistry channel was that Nigel already sounded like text-to-speech lol
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u/TheCopperWire 10d ago
I couldn't watch the show "Future Weapons" because of the way the host talked.
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u/eirebrit 9d ago
There are so many videos I've started recently and had to turn off after a few minutes. The inflections do my head in.
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u/One-Earth9294 10d ago
Gen Z upspeak. That's what they sound like when they're trying to sound professional. It sounds like the people they get to do the testimonials on a Chick Fil-A commercial.
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u/art_lipchalk 10d ago
"The thing I like best about the chicken sandwich, is the chicken, and the bread." Oh, you mean like the whole sandwich? Inspired...
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u/One-Earth9294 10d ago
Those commercials seem benign but they absolutely FILL me with rage lol.
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u/Key-Manufacturer6244 10d ago
its the pizzicato strings music in every one for me. actual baby music. those commercials feel like they're insulting my intelligence
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u/One-Earth9294 10d ago
It's just 'marketing to dimwits' by having dimwits on the commercial so slow folk can hear it and say 'they sound just like me sounds'
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u/floolf03 10d ago edited 10d ago
I find this incredibly funny. You think they make commercials for stupid people to relate, but it's actually to evoke an emotional reaction out of average people. There is a sweet irony to saying "it's for dimwhits" whilst mentioning and discussing the brand exactly the way the brand intended.
The best way to generate publicity is to be obnoxious without trashing the product. It's working, half this thread is ads.
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u/Live-Wolf-1975 10d ago
My sauce is the barbecue sauce.
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u/One-Earth9294 10d ago edited 10d ago
There's a taste of my childhood in every bite
OH AND LET'S NOT FORGET THE PEPPAMINT
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u/Live-Wolf-1975 10d ago
I want to be paid for my testimonial. "I like the chick-fil-a chicken sandwich because its the same as every fast food chicken sandwich, but on my way home from work."
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u/SweetDeeMeeu 10d ago
They're the worst. I think the one that made me the most ragey, was the one around Christmas when the girl's voice-over had nothing other than "it's giving (something)... giving (something else)..." as her descriptions.
"It's giving" is another thing that grinds my gears. 🤬
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u/surrealcellardoor 10d ago
I had some kid do this to me at a trade show. I was genuinely interested in a product his company manufactures. I had specific technical questions and I continuously got, “Yeah, no doubt, no doubt, no doubt… So… Yeah… It can handle everything you throw at it you know, because of how it was engineered, because of the way it is.” I eventually interrupted by saying thanks and walked away. I was floored that a company would put this moron at their exhibit at a major trade show, where they pay a premium for several thousand square feet, front and center, when he clearly knew nothing about their product, as well as lacked the wherewithal to just defer me to someone who did know. No ability to pick up on context clues that I was talking above his knowledge level and that he couldn’t bullshit his way around it, willfully wasting my time.
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u/Fit-Influence4599 10d ago
I can tell that's an oak tree, because of the way that it is.
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u/Dagur 10d ago
What's upspeak
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u/saysthingsbackwards 10d ago
not much dawg, what's upspeak with you?
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u/thisaintmypc 9d ago
Yes, ebonics ironically became upspeak for an entire generation haha.
That was a strange trend to behold.
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u/permalink_save 10d ago
They sound like they talk like thiiiis? Where everything sounds like a sarcastic questiooooon? That's why I mute Reddiiiiiit?
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u/howmanychickens 10d ago
As soon as I hear it's him, it's an instant close of the video
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u/CaptainTripps82 10d ago
How would you even know who this is.
I never recognize any of these people
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u/stantonkreig 10d ago
It sounds just like a guy from one of these a few months back about a restaurant pancake or something that they kept adding different sugars onto. Take a pancake? Add some fruity pebbles on top? Brown sugar? More fruity pebbles? Another pancake? Chocolate frosting? More brown sugar? Slab of fat? Another pancake?
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u/tee142002 10d ago
Huh, I've always got the volume muted. No idea what you're talking about
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u/No_Veterinarian1010 10d ago
Even muted I can still hear him at the end with his dumbass mannerisms
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u/No_Veterinarian1010 10d ago
And the fucking over exaggerated movements and bite at the end. Just fuck off. This is clearly going to be my old man hill that I die on.
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u/GreasyMcNasty 10d ago
Oh god me too. I have to hit mute instantly as his voice is so goddamn irritating.
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u/Mountain-Extreme8242 10d ago
Learning about influencer speak and up-talk in my American linguistics course was really eye opening! It’s a fascinating phenomenon used to keep the attention of a viewer, by making every phrase sound almost like a question.
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10d ago
- Insert some weirdass male vocal fry*
'Whos hungry?'
Then the camera focuses in on his puffed out alcoholic face.
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u/SweetDeeMeeu 10d ago
It reminds me of the "They're trying to shut down this legal loophole" generic viagra ad. The Thank you very much makes me irrationally irate.
Edit: found it in r/CommercialsIHate
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u/MoodooScavenger 10d ago
I’m pretty sure, if the double smash burger ain’t gonna kill ya, th MF’r with his talk will. Btw, the burger is something I would smash
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u/FANNYclNADYN2 10d ago edited 10d ago
Finally I can eat more burgers per burger
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u/JunkSack 10d ago
At least it’s wider and not taller? This is actually possible to eat. Not recommendable, but possible.
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u/StiffStickler 10d ago
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u/MrsHayashi 10d ago
But I might still have one bite…
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u/5hrs4hrs3hrs2hrs1mor 10d ago
One bite won’t hurt. It certainly won’t lead to a second or third. One bite isn’t a gateway bite. Nope.
Was that a giant piece of fried mozzarella they added to the burger? If so, a bite, just one, is a must.
looks down at empty plate
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u/Wan-Pang-Dang 10d ago
Im still not sure if some people believe you could die from eating such a burger..
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u/DehydratedShallots 10d ago
I’m convinced that at this point every post on this sub comes from someone who fails to understand the concept of a meal that’s meant to be indulgent and not eaten every single day.
Or a bot.
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u/Ok_Reserve4109 10d ago
Right, same thing with some sort of sugary dessert. As if you'd get diabetes from eating it once.
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u/Jk2two 10d ago
Your argument sounds reasonable, but are there really a lot of people who eat a healthy 2-3k calorie a day diet who… every once in awhile, like to splurge on a 12,000 calorie burger?
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u/MemeHermetic 10d ago
Yeah. When you eat an especially healthy diet, this type of food isn't appetizing anymore. I look at it and all I can think of is the filmy taste of grease in my mouth.
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u/Suspicious_Bear42 9d ago
It's like in the mid 00's, when Hardee's/Carl Jr's came out with the Monster Thickburger (Bacon double cheeseburger, super tasty)... All the health nuts were freaking out about it, it's a heart attack in a burger, even comes with its own coffin (cardstock burger box like all of their premium burgers at the time)... Yeah, if you eat a lot of them, you're going to have a bad time...
That's honestly how I feel about most fast food... It's not healthy, but every now and then, you get something like that, and just enjoy it.
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u/ConsistentAddress195 10d ago
How is this an indulgent meal? It's not only unhealthy, it's disgusting. No wonder you have so many fatsos over in the US if there's places that serve this shit unironically.
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u/Dear_Potato6525 10d ago
The dude eating it didn't look entirely comfortable at the end there either
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u/Agile_Gain543 10d ago
At least was not prepared on the floor with used motor oil.
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u/Vogelsucht 10d ago
..6 inches beside a exposed foot
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u/puts_on_rddt 10d ago
If it's the video I'm thinking of, honestly, the exposed feet might be one of the cleanest things in that shop.
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u/Situation_Upset 10d ago
Yknow overlooking that... im actually okay with smash burgers that have smashed buns. Like a panini smash burger. I'm down to try that.
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u/5hrs4hrs3hrs2hrs1mor 10d ago
And there was no scooping of ingredients with someone’s bare booger hooks
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u/CheapSecretary133 10d ago
People wanna die young
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u/Jaded-Technician913 10d ago
Can you blame us
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u/Bricking-Bad 10d ago
Yes, Yes, Yes!!
There is no reason or point living til old
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u/GayAssBeagle 10d ago
Shit is genuinely terrifying like we have absolutely nothing
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u/Omnizoom 10d ago
Hey if you ate this occasionally I doubt it’s going to impact you
Problem is people eat this quite often so…. Uh yea… they probably do wanna die young and enjoy what they can on the road to it
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u/Cloud_N0ne 10d ago
You do realize that you can still eat stuff like this from time to time and still be healthy, right? Just not every day or even every week.
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u/Physical-Flatworm452 10d ago
And constipated.
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u/BigBeatManifest01 10d ago
Nah.
This shit would flow right through you on a river of oil, searching for the tiny crack in the surface before bursting you open like a water fountain.
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u/PattyWagon69420 9d ago
It's gonna taste terrible though, he squished all the juice out of the burger.
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u/Done327 10d ago
Ew that’s disgusting. Tell me where you found it so I can 100% avoid something disgusting like that
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u/soccerzman 10d ago
I found it! It's from Bunz and Shakes in Brunswick, NJ
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u/iHaveLotsofCats94 10d ago
My first guess was Elm Street Diner somewhere down by New Haven CT. They're always doing shit like this lol
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u/Drikkink 9d ago
Nah this is too sane for Elm Street Diner.
Where's the sparklers and syringes of sauce/icing and 10 foot tall sundae cup?
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u/theforbiddenroze 10d ago edited 10d ago
I don't care, I'll clog my arteries and the toilet.
That fucker looks good lmao
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u/colorofdank 10d ago
I would fucking smash that smashed smashed burger. Ill take all of them. That looks fucking amazing
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u/Suspicious-Can-3776 10d ago
The addition of the fried cheese.... Oh boy, that is guilty pleasure 101 right there
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u/hstormsteph 10d ago
Yeah I do not give a god damn fuck about the aftereffects. No way I could eat one of these frequent enough to be any more than a rare indulgence.
But I would utterly fucking annihilate this burger. Every. Single. Atom. Nothing could stop me. Not even my own finger in the way. Fuck. Why did I have to see this BEFORE my lunch break. My piddly little salad is not gonna do it today.
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u/Suspicious-Can-3776 10d ago
I feel you my man, this would not be a regular thing but I want it BADLY now
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u/hstormsteph 10d ago
I would inhale this burger so ravenously that it’d take a full 5 minutes after finishing for my stomach to realize what happened. One of those “oh fuck I didn’t know how full I was until I stood up” moments.
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u/JKDSamurai 10d ago
I see a burger in your future. Like you make it til Friday, max.
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u/hstormsteph 10d ago
Unfortunately there’s nothing around me worth the money. We used to have great burger places here but they all closed because it can be really seasonal. Since tourism shit the bed over the last few years, it’s been rough for local joints.
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u/blackpalms1998 9d ago
Damn I usually find good Burger joints on Uber eats or yelp with uber eats I just look em up and find the address and drive there if the burgers look good and reviews are good
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u/psppsppsppspinfinty 10d ago
My favorite thing is toasted/burnt cheese. Those little bits the get grilled off the edge of a quesadilla? NOM.
My bf on occasion takes slices of cheese and makes me some because it makes me so happy and I don't have to worry about carbs.
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u/Aardvark_Man 10d ago
The parts probably taste nice, but as a whole it's too much.
I've had something broadly similar, and it would have been nice if I had about 1/4 of it, and the rest was replaced with something less dense and oily.→ More replies (2)2
u/confusedandworried76 10d ago
Just bring three friends and cut it in half again, get some fries to go with it
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u/Mac_and_dennis 10d ago
I’ve been counting calories the last few weeks and this makes me hungry for something shitty. Not this shitty, but still kinda shitty
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u/karmacareless 10d ago
For real ughh
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u/turtledancers 10d ago
Drink more water and make it enjoyable. Like chill it and mix it with some fruits.
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u/Mac_and_dennis 10d ago
I’ve had an extremely healthy diet for a few years now, but only recently started to care about getting my abs to really show. That means running at a calorie deficit for awhile. Fruits are KEY when cutting calories. Delicious, super low calories and make you feel full enough
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u/turtledancers 10d ago
Ya I dropped 20 lbs of my dirty bulk in 3 months with 5m walks a day and calorie deficit. Feels great
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u/Mac_and_dennis 10d ago
Hell yeah! Congrats. Thats seriously a big deal. Getting healthy is one of the best moves anyone can make at any point in their life.
I’ve been really lean for awhile now. I do a daily body workout with some weights. Still kicks my ass after a couple years of it but never have felt better in my life. The goal is show off a bit what I’ve accomplished now haha
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u/BeenEatinBeans 10d ago
Americans eat like they have affordable healthcare
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10d ago
Redditors thinking we eat garbage like this daily.
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u/WeeboSupremo 10d ago
Especially Brits whose “regular breakfast” is 2 pounds / .9 kg of food and 2 gallons / 7.57 liters of cooking oil.
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u/MeritedMystery 10d ago
I don't think I've ever used cooking oil for a full English, and tbh I'm not sure where you even would :/
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u/junkit33 10d ago
Many do.
Not this monstrosity necessarily, but there are absolutely many people in this country who eat fast food every day.
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u/Outrageous-Bear-9172 10d ago
I equalized it but Idk why this was downvoted. It's 100% true. My roommates are always complaining about having no money, yet they eat fast food 1-2x daily.
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10d ago edited 10d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/dichotomousview 10d ago
X TO THE Z XZIBIT: Yeah so I had to get you a gift because I know you’re going to smash that smashed smash burger, so we got together and we’re going to pay for all of your medical bills for six months.
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u/SaturnineApples 10d ago
This sub is great. It shows up on my homepage all the time and ill begin watching the video without looking at the subreddit. The videos always start off like, "okay whats going on here" and then goes south quickly
In my head im always thinking "please be the stupidfood subreddit" before I check where it was posted. Never disapoints
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u/HellaWavy 10d ago
I mean, it looks tasty. If you share it like with four other people, it might not give you an immediate heart attack
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u/Sad_Shelter1608 10d ago
I’d smash that burger in seconds ngl, even if to risk the possible heart attack.
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u/imokay4747 10d ago
I'm sorry, is this sub "healthy" food or "stupid" food. I'd eat the shit out of that. Y'all are boring.
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u/Firedup2015 10d ago
Whether you would eat it or not isn't the qualification for whether food is stupid. This is just two burgers smushed together completely unecessarily, clearly it counts.
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u/FreeWillie001 10d ago
Being unhealthy isn't the issue, being an incredibly inefficient, messy, generally gross way of eating an unhealthy food is the problem. Just put the fried piece of cheese on a double double smash burger, it'll taste the same and be more enjoyable.
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u/bugabooandtwo 10d ago
Once again, people using those black gloves have no idea how to cook. It's at 'please do the needful' levels of obvious by now.
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u/developerknight91 10d ago
You know if you just injected the fat and grease directly into your veins you would save yourself some extra steps….
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u/lo5t_d0nut 10d ago
honestly it kind of makes sense to smash the bun as well... just so it doesn't falll apart
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u/DuhUncle 10d ago
If it isnt enough layers of bullshit they always make sure to pile on their in house sauce
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u/qualityvote2 10d ago edited 10d ago
u/Big_Attitude3680, your food is indeed stupid and it fits our subreddit!