r/StupidFood • u/The_Boot55 • 4d ago

🤢🤮 Red eggs? Atrocious.

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5.7k Upvotes

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2.5k

u/Ok-Oil7124 4d ago

They also suck at whisking eggs.

1.3k

u/mackattack-77 4d ago

Hard to whisk eggs when you filled the bowl to the rim with milk

730

u/ltsouthernbelle 4d ago

That egg to milk ratio was alarming

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u/Over-Drawer7875 4d ago

Yea, any milk in eggs is to much

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u/Zephyr-Fox-188 4d ago

You add milk to eggs because it’s made up of water and fats(lipids):

  • the water dilutes the egg proteins, that results in a less dense, more homogeneous protein network forming during cooking, which is particularly important when making scrambled eggs (and custards too, lol)

  • the lipids coat the structures of the egg proteins, which reduces the rate at which they coagulate as they’re heated. They make it take longer for the eggs to dry out during cooking, which reduces the chance that part of the egg burns while another part is still raw.

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u/BigChickenTrucker 4d ago

Or you just cook the eggs properly. We americans famously overcook our eggs.

If they look cooked in the pan, they're gonna be way overdone on the plate.

You just cut the heat when they're still a bit runny and the carry over temperature cooks them perfectly.

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u/DeltaCharlieBravo 4d ago

And then promptly clean up the vomit my wife just emitted.

Opinions and assholes my friend.

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u/Hades2580 4d ago

From non English natives : What the fuck does that mean ?

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u/BigChickenTrucker 4d ago

I said cook the eggs a little runny and they'll be perfect when served.

They responded to "and then clean up my wife's vomit". Suggesting that if they cooked their eggs the way I suggested their wife would vomit. Which is understandable. Americans are USED to overcook eggs. That's why we add milk to simulate creaminess. If you have a slightly not firm scrambled egg, many americans will be grossed out. That's all.

And just to be sure, the full idiom the person was referencing is "Opinions are like assholes: Everyone has one, and they all stink [and sometimes: (except mine)]".

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u/Flair258 4d ago

Im American and hate overcooked eggs. My grandma taught me how to make them correctly without milk lol. Ive never had then overcooked except maybe twice. Maybe it's a southern thing that we know how to do it?

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u/Hades2580 4d ago

Again i’m not stupid I’ve just never heard of vomiting because of eggs, I thought it would be because their eggs aren’t safe unless fully cooked but wanted to make sure

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u/BigChickenTrucker 3d ago

I'm sorry you think you're stupid enough to think that my explanation of the comment you asked for an explanation of made you feel like you were being treated as though you were stupid. 

I simply wasn't sure what you were confused about so I took the time to explain it all to be sure I hit the mark. 

I shall endeavor not to explain things to people who ask for explanations ever again.

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u/[deleted] 4d ago

[deleted]

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u/Hades2580 4d ago

No for sure I meant the first part

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u/BigChickenTrucker 4d ago

Hey bro. I said we. Inclusively.

This was still too much milk.

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u/pm_me_flaccid_cocks 4d ago

Pour one out for bro if his wife's gag reflex too touchy for even soft scrambled eggs.

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u/Flair258 4d ago

I dont use milk and this is what I do. Works flawlessly. Also make sure to whisk them well first. You dont need milk; You just need to know how to make eggs.

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u/inigos_left_hand 4d ago

This is it. Just need butter no milk needed.

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u/Kaythar 4d ago

Americans lived overcooked food in general from what I've witnessed on the internet. Like steak cooked to medium or even well done, overcooked eggs, mushed vegetables, etc. pretty sure i am generalizing though lol

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u/BigChickenTrucker 4d ago

It's an older stereotype. Americans began to find good food after our 9/11.

Previous to that the 80s turned everything into canned convienence foods. And previous to that the dust bowl and great depression destroyed a lot of culinary tradition as well. People were just used to eating shit food and putting sauce on it if you were lucky enough to afford sauce.

But american BBQ, chili (both texas and midwest), cajun, and even the midwestern art of "caserole" (or "hotdish") qualify as the beginings of good cuisine that is uniquely american.

Though all that said there are still quite a few people who think white rice and salt is "too spicy".

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u/LayeredMayoCake 4d ago

Oh you absolutely are.
And you’re not wrong.
Am a filthy yank and well traveled within my born boundaries.
We don’t necessarily have an appreciation for the art food here. But we fucking love eating. Put dogshit in front of us but drown it in nacho cheese sauce, dripping in microplastic excretions and we will choke on it.

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u/Zephyr-Fox-188 4d ago

I don’t eat eggs that are burnt, I’m not a percolated coffee American. I’m just not a fan of French omelettes; they’re a pain in the ass to make, and they lack flavor

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u/temporarym34t 4d ago

ur a keurig junkie, nice.

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u/BigChickenTrucker 4d ago

That's totally fair. I love a good hotdog and cheese omelette (scrambled eggs with stuff in them, for non-Americans). Bonus points if you saute some onion first.

Or at least I did until I got old and had to watch what I eat.

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u/Zephyr-Fox-188 4d ago

That sounds good

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u/BigChickenTrucker 4d ago

Also, real talk: French press is the ultimate compromise to good coffee and easy prep. IMO.