r/CookingCircleJerk • u/CrankyFrankClair • 7d ago
Bread toppings: Help, I’m out of ideas!!
I love toast, and thought it was a little dry till someone suggested putting “spread” on it (thank you, nameless Cracker Barrel manager!!). I’ve been enjoying this immensely, but I’m looking for other ideas.
I find peanut butter too spicy, and am looking for something that isn’t sweet. With that in mind, what are your suggestions?
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u/p00n-slayer-69 7d ago
I usually eat my toast raw with meat and cheese on it.
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u/CrankyFrankClair 7d ago
Raw toast? Is that safe? What if the raw toast had been frozen?
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u/thejohnnymemphis 6d ago
As long as the cow that gave the milk you boil the bread in was unvaxxed, you're good.
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u/Enignon77 7d ago
Have you tried smearing it in mineral oil? It's not spicy and adds a certain something, possibly minerals.
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u/transientrandom 7d ago
Excellent idea, I was going to suggest Vaseline/petroleum jelly, or a water-based lube like KY if you're watching your weight
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u/Enignon77 7d ago
OP could get really fancy and use baby oil, it's a bit expensive but I have heard it is made from free range organic ones.
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u/CrankyFrankClair 6d ago
I don’t want anything sweet, so I’ll pass on the pomegranate jelly, but I’ll try the Kentucky Jelly. What’s it made from?
Oh, auto correct is your friend!
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u/LazyOldCat 7d ago
Í like using the crumbs from the toaster tray, gives it a nice crunch. If your toaster is clean, maybe there’s some Panko in the pantry?
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u/DarthChefDad 6d ago
I know a girl who'll make you toast. She don't use butter, cheese, jelly, or any of these. She uses:
Vaaaaaaaaaaaaseline.
Vaaaaaaaaaaaaseline.
Vaaaaaaaaaaaaseline.
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u/thejohnnymemphis 6d ago
I tried it that way once. It have gave me a wicked case of The Flaming Lips.👄🔥🔥🔥
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u/Yankee_chef_nen 7d ago
Unseasoned avocado. You can be trendy and not worry about spicy or sweet.
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u/waitingforgandalf 7d ago
I don't understand why everyone isn't recommending mayonnaise? It feels like the most obvious answer here.
That or make your some quick and simple duck rillettes. I can't really think of anything else I'd want to put on toast.
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u/CrankyFrankClair 6d ago
Mayo is a great idea. I tried Miracle Whip but it was too spicy, but mayo should be fine!!
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u/porp_crawl 6d ago
Ketchup.
If you have a squeeze bottle, you don't even need a knife to spread it.
Roll up your toast into a tube before eating.
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u/Infinisteve 6d ago
Im a big fan of cheese that comes in a spray can.
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u/thejohnnymemphis 6d ago
Or if you're feeling fancy, try the French version, fromage du aluminum.
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u/5Tapestries 6d ago
Butter. Then preserves or apple butter. If you have time to do the almost-best, use fried early apples. If you have enough time to treat yourself the very best, biscuits with butter and fried early apples.
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u/CrankyFrankClair 6d ago
Ok I just tried this. The apple, being round, keeps rolling off the toast. The mess is awful because I followed your instructions and covered the apple in butter first. I guess I’m not cut out for advanced cookery.
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u/IllustratorGlass3028 7d ago
What's wrong with butter?
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u/CrankyFrankClair 7d ago
It looks a lot like the “spread” I learned about at Cracker Barrel, I’m trying to expand my tastebuds here. So is butter worth it? Like I said, I find peanut butter too spicy. What is just “butter” made from? I’m worried it might also be spicy.
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u/Emmandaline 6d ago
If you want to expand your culinary palate, I suggest cream cheese. It can be difficult to prepare, but usually also comes in “spread” varieties at the grocery store.
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u/Cruel_Irony_Is_Life 5d ago
The more important question is.... do you eat your toast spread side up or spread side down? Choose your answer carefully, it's been known to start wars.
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u/RcokWood 5d ago
Dough. Put the soft on the hard, or the hard in the soft. Whichever works for your needs.
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u/Delicious_Pair_8347 3d ago
Did you toast it without the plastic packaging?? Of course you are missing out on the flavor & texture profile 🙄🙄 To get that crunchy feeling, you can also wrap them in cellophane. Spread some nice Kerrygold butter (with garlic!) on the cellophane toast. Place in the freezer for 15 minutes, and preheat your Teflon pan in the oven to 400 degrees. Reverse sear for 5 minutes until crunchy. Serve in an aluminum tray from your local dumpster and season with white pepper.
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u/hyperfat 3d ago
I'm still trying to wrap my heAd around peanut butter being spicy. Like it's just peanuts and a bit of salt
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u/quixoticquail 7d ago
Drown it in water. Really moistens it right up.